End of the Line

Another mediocre Vikings season came to the end of the line today with an overtime loss to the Broncos. It didn't matter anyway, as Washington beat the suddenly helpless Dallas Cowboys to claim the last NFC wild-card slot. But, hey, we improved from 6-10 to 8-8. And, we've experienced the kick-ass offense, the Culture of Accountability and learned it takes 21 days to change a habit. Here's a few of my observations and questions:

1. It's a little scary how Adrian Peterson got shut down 4 weeks in a row. I'm going to chalk that up to defenses being able to key on the run 100% and almost ignore stopping the pass. I hope.

2. Tarvarius Jackson has me confused. At times, he looks poised and competent. At other times, he looks totally lost. I guess the Vikes go into 2008 with him as their starter. But how long do they wait for Jackson's "snails-pace" progression? By the way, how the hell did it get to be 2008?

3. Troy. Williamson. Is. Terrible. Did you see that bomb from Jackson (a perfect pass, by the way) bounce off his shoulder pad? He beat his guy by ten yards. In case you missed it, here it is:
My God, back in THE DAY kids got laughed off the Manz school playground for plays like that. This guy was the 7th pick in the draft. I thought they fixed his vision problems in the off-season. I guess not. If I were the coach, my first off-season move would be to cut Williamson.

4. Remember when the Vikings were a perennial playoff team? I had feathered hair back then.

5. Now Dwight Smith can smoke as much pot as he wants.

6. All hope is not lost for the Vikes. Along with Peterson on offense, I really like the future of the Linebacker position with E.J. Henderson, Ben Leber and Chad Greenway. Yep.

7. The Vikings have got to go back to the old-school uniforms with the gray face masks and stripes on the sleeves. This may be the real reason they missed the playoffs the last two years. By the way, if they ever go to a black third-jersey (like the Lions) I will never watch another game as long as I live.

8. The Vikings lease at the Metrodome ends in 2011. Seriously, where do you think they will play in 2012?

9. When will those long dreadlocks that hang out of the back of the helmet finally go out of style? Seriously, in 20 years those will be laughed at like 70's afros are laughed at today.

10. Do you think there will ever be a steroid investigation in pro football? Do you think that any NFL players might have, just once, taken any performance-enhancing substances? Maybe even by accident? Naw, that's crazy talk.....

11. I have never been more confident that the Green Bay Packers will beat the New England Patriots in the Super Bowl.

12. At least Chilly doesn't hide his mouth with that plastic card when play-calling as much anymore. That is one serious positive to come out of the 2007 season.

Just some things to ponder as we move into the new year.

Peace,

Jeff

What Jeff Thinks - Best of MY 2007

Well, yet another year is almost finished. They sure go a lot faster now that I have kids and am getting older. Since 2007 is almost in the books, I thought it would be a good time to name "the best of 2007" in MY opinion. Now, I don't out much folks, so I am very limited when it comes to movies, buying albums, etc. Most of the movies that I see are kid's flicks, for example. So, while I know there are better choices available for most of these picks, these are my favorites for 2007:

BEST ALBUM: Wilco, "Sky Blue Sky." Runner Up: Jason Isbell, "Sirens of the Ditch."

BEST MOVIE: "Knocked Up." Runner Up: "Superbad." (Quick note - "Superbad DID NOT make my wife's "Best Of" list)

BEST BOOK: "Minnesota North Stars History and Memories with Lou Nanne" by Bob Showers. Runner Up: Ahhhhh......... I am admittedly more of a "news guy" than "book guy." Check out Pat Ruesse's excellent column on the North Star book:

http://www.startribune.com/sports/wild/12839841.html?page=1&c=y

BEST CONCERT: Wilco, Northrop Auditorium. Runner Up: For sheer fun, The Flaming Lips at The Myth.

BEST SPORTING EVENT ATTENDED: Wild playoff victory over Anaheim. Runner Up: Many choices here, but I'm going with the Vikings victory over Chicago on Monday Night Football.

BEST BEER: That's a tough one, but I always go back to Summit Winter Ale. Runner Up: All the rest.

BEST SHIRT: My new Sasquatch t-shirt from the BFRO web site. Runner Up: Nothing is even close.

BEST NEW HOBBY: Playing the bass guitar. Runner Up: Blogging (of course).

TOP LOCAL NEWS STORY: The collapse of the 35W bridge. Runner Up: Hennepin County reaches land sale agreement with LPII and construction of new Twins stadium begins. (geez, something really big had to happen locally to trump that runner up for me...)

TOP LOCAL SPORTS STORY: Vikings draft Adrian Peterson. Runner Up: Timberwolves trade Kevin Garnett to Boston.

TOP LOCAL WEATHER STORY: It was a good old-fashioned white Christmas - just like the ones I used to know!

LOCAL "CELEBRITY" MOST LIKELY TO SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST: TIM BREWSTER. Runner Up: That guy Rusty on Channel 5 news.

And here is a sneak peak at 2008:

TOP LOCAL STORY TO WATCH IN 2008: The Republican National Convention being held at the Xcel Energy Center in St. Paul. There will be some posts about this in the coming months. All I know is this - those protesters had better not harm the X.

Those are my top stories for 2007. Let me know what you think, and some of your top picks for 2007.

Peace,

Jeff

Back In The Normal Universe

After spending 5 weeks in a parallel universe, the Minnesota Vikings are finally back in their normal stratosphere. They lost 32-21 to the Washington Redskins, blowing their best (and possibly only) chance to make the playoffs for the 2008 season. I had very, very bad vibes before this game. I expressed this to couple of you, but decided against putting any mention of these bad vibes in this blog. I wanted to be positive (the ultimate in irony). In fact, after the Vikings got tackled for a safety early in this game, I declared "I'm going to try and be positive tonight." My oldest son's response was "good luck with that."

Yep. He knows his dad.

Here are some thoughts on the game:

1. Tavarius Jackson is completely overmatched. I am not saying he is not a capable NFL Quarterback. He is not a capable STARTING NFL Quarterback. The Vikings need to find another starting quarterback next year. Jackson has got to quit jumping in the air while throwing. It's killing me.

2. Teams know how to defense Adrian Peterson. Hey, if you can't pass, 8 guys consistently in the box will usually stop Walter Payton and Barry Sanders.

3. Chilly was out-coached tonight. He knew he was duped on that "12 men on the field" challenge by Gibbs. He was completely duped, and he knew it. Lesson learned (?). Probably not.

4. I can't remember the last time the Vikings won a game in which John Madden was the commentator. Seriously, it's been years. He is a jinx - plain and simple. I think Madden only brought up Brettfavre once, though.

5. I knew deep down the game was lost as soon as Fred (Smootzie) Smoots had an interception. Cuz you know, nothing bad that ever happened to Smootzie while he was in Minnesota was his fault ("he wuz robbed") ("nothing happened on that boat"). The fact that he is still playing and will probably be in the playoffs is proof that Satan exists.

6. Another reason I knew they were going to lose? I wore the Old School Cris Carter jersey during the game. Never, ever, get excited enough to ever don Vikings apparel. It'll burn you every time. I even bought chips and salsa and had CR over to watch the game. The last time I did stuff like that the Vikes lost 41-0 to the Giants in the NFC Championship game.

Oh, well. Now that we have passed out of the parallel universe, it is almost comforting to be back in reality. While we were in a parallel universe and the Vikings were winning, I didn't know what kind of other crazy stuff was going to happen. I didn't know if aliens were going to land and abduct me, or if dragons were going to descend on St. Paul. Or maybe good things would happen, like I would understand how to fix broken appliances or something. But probably not. Now things can get back to normal.

Peace, and Merry Christmas.

Jeff

Christmas Card From What Jeff Thinks

I know what you are thinking. Each day when you check the mail and receive Christmas cards from the large majority of your friends, one is missing. Each day, you think "....geez, we received a card from everybody except that ass-hole Jeff." Well, don't feel bad, because we have not sent them out the last few years. Now, this is not some political or religious statement. I love the Christmas season. And it certainly is not because my family is not photogenic. As you know, we are damn good-looking. It is out of laziness, pure and simple, and I apologize for that.

So, I would like each of you to consider this a Christmas Card from What Jeff Thinks. I appreciate your readership and commentary.

And, we'll get back to sending legitimate Christmas Cards in 2008.

Peace,

Jeff

What A Joke

Well, there you have it, folks. Baseball Armageddon. The Four Horseman are mounting up on their steeds. The Seattle Mariners Baseball Club, in their infinite wisdom, have signed starting pitcher Carlos Silva for:

4 years - $48 million dollars.

Yes, you read that correctly. Never before has a player so completely mediocre (bordering on bad, even) been signed for so much money. This would be funny if the ramifications on baseball were not so sad. Here are Silva's 2007 statistics:

13 wins

14 losses

4.19 ERA

202 Innings Pitched - 229 Hits Allowed

THAT is worth $12 million a year?

My God, what will Johan Santana be worth?? How about 106 GA-zillion a year?

Trade Santana now, Twins, while you can get something in return. What an absolute joke.

Jeff

Midweek Thoughts...

Here are the important topics that are on my mind today:

1. I attended the Viking-Bear game with Pete Monday night. It was a blast. The Vikings won the game 20-13 mainly due to the ineptitude of Bears QB Kyle Orton and the prehistoric Chicago offense. I was a little concerned, however, during the first half when the Vikes were turning the ball over on virtually every drive. I found myself uttering "they are doing it again..." over and over again. They turned it around, however, and I give them credit for winning an ugly game. Which brings me to my next thought:

2. There were lots of Bears fans in attendance on Monday night. Now, I have lived in either Minnesota or Wisconsin my entire life. It is my opinion that people from these two states are inherently the same. Sure, there are some minor differences, but the northern-midwest cultures and outlooks on life are basically the same. I don't know about Bear fans from Illinois. Or White Sox fans from Illinois. Or Blackhawks fans from Illinois. You get the picture. Now, don't get me wrong - Chicago has great fans. But, I have been to plenty of Packers/Brewers games here at the Dome or in Wisconsin, and those fans just want to have a good time and drink some beer. Sure, there is some good-natured ribbing, but overall it's a good time. From my experience, Chicago fans have an air of superiority and smugness about them that is unmatched in the Midwest. They don't smile much either. And they are very loud. Most walked into the Dome Monday night with a look that seemingly pronounced "Hey rubes, I'm from Chicago!" But they were very quiet as they filed out of the Dome after the game, so it was worth it.

3. Speaking of Chicago, anybody out there still think the Twins should have drafted Mark Prior over Joe Mauer?

4. Speaking of the Twins, they missed out on a great opportunity by not obtaining the rights to Japanese star Kosuke Fukudome. What a perfect last name for a Twins player as the new stadium is being built: fuk-u-dome.

5. Speaking again of the Twins, there are rumors that Carlos Silva is going to sign a 4-year contract with the Seattle Mariners worth $44 million. Once again, my Eau Claire public-school math tells me that is $11 million per year. If Carlos Silva, a .500 pitcher at best, is worth $11 million a year, Johan Santana is worth $75 million a year. And my paperboy is worth $200 grand a year. And the guy who served me a burger at Wendy's is worth $500 grand a year. and so on.....

That's all I have for now.

Jeff

The Vision - Becoming Clearer

The September Vision that I had of the Packers winning the Super Bowl is coming along quite nicely. While the Packers were trouncing the St. Louis Rams today, this happened:

Eagles 10 - Cowboys 6.

I'm sure all of you are sick of hearing this, but the Pack will win out, and the Cowboys will choke against the Redskins the last week of the season. The Packers will have home-field advantage in the playoffs, represent the NFC and BEAT New England in the Super Bowl. There is nothing that can be done about this. It's like the sun setting in the West.

Folks, does anyone really believe the Dallas Cowboys are a Super Bowl team? They almost lost to the Lions last week (sorry dools) for God sakes. Then they go and put up 6 points at home to the Eagles? Sweet. Right now, I believe in my heart that the Vikings would put a beating on the Cowboys. In fact, we're so far into this crazy parallel universe that I am going to go out on a limb and say that, as of 12-16-07 at 9:32 PM, the Vikings are the 2nd best team in the NFC. As always, this says more about the NFC than it does the Vikings.

Oh, and by the way, I have good news and bad news for Tony Romo. Here it is:

Good news: Possible Romo love-interest Jessica Simpson attended the game in Dallas today.

Bad news: Possible Romo love-interest Jessica Simpson attended the game in Dallas today.

That story was actually covered on msn.com. Wow, nice game Tony. So much for Jessica Simpson. Better luck next time.

By the way, I will be attending the Vikes-Bears game Monday night at the Dome with my friend Pete. If history remains true, we'll be sitting next to some "really nice people" from Illinois. More on that later.

Peace,

Jeff

More Stuff Falls In My Lap

I wasn't really planning on blogging today, but sometimes stuff just falls in my lap and screams to be written about. Today, we have Dwight Smith of the Minnesota Vikings. The Vikings, as you may know, have won 5 out of their last 6 games and can possibly make the playoffs. They have also enjoyed a nice run off of the field, with nobody getting arrested in months(!). This is where Safety Dwight Smith comes into the equation. From today's Star Tribune:

Vikings safety Dwight Smith faces significant NFL discipline after admitting that he smoked marijuana Thursday night in downtown Minneapolis.

Minneapolis police cited Smith for possession of marijuana and obstructing traffic, both petty misdemeanors, at the intersection of 2nd Avenue S. and 4th Street S.

Smith was among a group of players Thursday night who attended a fundraiser hosted by linebacker E.J. Henderson at Bellanotte restaurant. According to the police report, an officer saw Smith's car impeding traffic in front of Sheik's Palace Royale nightclub at 10:11 p.m. The officer approached the car and "smelled the strong odor of marijuana," according to the report. The report also said Smith "admitted he just got done smoking some marijuana."

Nice. You know, I really believe that the Vikings have rid their team of most of their bad characters recently, but as I have commented to many people, Smith is a reminder of "the Fred Smootzie days." I hear Smith interviewed after games and I think "bad guy." This is not Smithzie's first brush with the law in downtown Minneapolis. As you may remember, he was caught in a stairwell "receiving a favor" from a woman (must have been a fan) from Hudson. Now, I am not saying that smoking pot and "receiving favors" are on par with domestic abuse, robbery, etc., but, my God, have some smarts! If you need to do this stuff (because you're keepin' it real), don't do it in public in downtown Minneapolis with cops everywhere. What an idiot.

But here is the funny part that caused me to have to blog immediately this morning. It turns out Coach Childress actually took time during the offseason to "educate" players on "the dangers of downtown social life." According to the same story by Kevin Seifert and Judd Zulgad here is what Chilly did this summer:

Childress said he personally walked the beat with Minneapolis police officers during the offseason, attended a squad meeting and left his cellular phone number on a bulletin board to promote his accessibility with police.

Childress also visited individual nightclubs, including Spin -- where cornerback Cedric Griffin was arrested in April. Childress said he used those visits to develop a detailed video and educational program for players during offseason workouts.

I had to read that three times and make sure that it was the Star Tribune and not the Onion that I was reading. Chilly actually visited EACH downtown establishment that his players might show up at (you know, there are a few strip clubs down there) so he could warn them of their dangers. I am not making this up. Here's a quote from Chilly:

"I don't have my head in the sand," Childress said. "We are always trying to be proactive about these things. I stood up there and told them, 'Hey fellas, I've spent time down there.' Here are some of the things that go on."

Now that is funny. Chilly is going to tell his players about what goes on in the clubs in Minneapolis. You know, I think I am going to try and use this one on my wife. "Honey, I HAD to go to each and every strip club in Minneapolis so I could warn my kids of some of the things that go on there."

You cannot make this stuff up. Sometimes stuff just falls in your lap.

Go Vikes.

Jeff

Where Have You Gone Kent Hrbek, A Nation Turns Its Lonely Eyes To You...

You know, there used to be a day when baseball players didn't look like Gold's Gym workout fanatics. A guy could look like a fat tub of goo and still play in the majors based on his ability. Look at Babe Ruth. Hot dogs and bourbon, baby. A more recent example, and one of my favorite players of all-time, is Kent Hrbek. He got by on The Big Three - Beer, Brats & Bowling. And I loved him for that. You know that Kent didn't dabble in any "extracurriculars" on the side.

Well, we found out today why many players in recent memory looked like Gold's Gym workout fanatics. Many DID dabble in the extracurriculars, you see. They were on frickin' steroids. The so-called Mitchell report was published today and implicated more than 80 Major League Baseball players, current and past, for using steroids. This really doesn't shock me, but there it is in black and white. I have to read more of this report to digest what it implies. There are some well-known names on this list. Roger Clemens, Lenny Dykstra, Andy Pettitte, David Justice, Mo Vaughn, Miguel Tejada, Rafael Palmeiro (don't they mean Viagra?), etc. Before I can comment more on the implications of this report, I have to do some thinking. However, there are a few names on the report that I am ready to comment on:

1. Chuck Knoblauch. Now we know why he suddenly couldn't throw to first base. We also know what might have contributed to him being such an ass-hole off the field. Roid-rage, baby. Or maybe he was just an ass-hole.

2. Rondell White. Now, come on. Really? Did steroids help Rondell hit the ball further? I don't know, he never hit the ball.

3. Derrick Turnbow. Where did Derrick apply the steroids - his hair?

This, no doubt, taints the game of baseball. Baseball is the Grand Old Game, however, and has survived other scandals. It will survive this one.

At least we'll always have Kent Hrbek. Beer, brats & bowling.

Peace,

Jeff

Guest Blogger #1 - tony8489

On the first anniversary of What Jeff Thinks, I solicited readers to see if anyone was interested in Guest Blogging. The first reader to take me up on this offer is tony8489. I've known tony8489 since the days of Manz Elementary school in Eau Claire. He's big into politics, current events, sports, etc. He like to stir up and take part in conversation. Always has. However, tony 8489 has not chosen to write about the aforementioned topics. You see, right before Thanksgiving, tony8489 lost one of his best friends (if not his best friend). His friends death was very, very unexpected and he left a wife and five sons behind. Oddly enough, this individual was also a childhood best friend to another reader of this blog (and one of my best friends), Pete. Small world. So, I know two people who are experiencing the grieving process right now.

Were not supposed to lose our best friends in their forties. That is supposed to happen in our 60's, 70's and after, right? And they are not supposed to leave young kids behind. But this has happened, and tony8489 has written about it. Quite eloquently, I might add. He has described this post as a "cautionary tale." Here you go....

Guest Blogger #1 - tony8489:

I will never forget the day I met you. You came over to our college house with another buddy and we hit it off quite well. You were so handsome back then, but I think maybe we all were. So full of life. No receding hairlines, grey hair, or round, protruding bellies. We were so young, and quite soon, it would be off to the races. But not yet. No, we had too much to do. You had said that your long time girlfirend since high school wanted to see other people, and you were not really ok with that. So, to hide your deep sorrow, you partied like it was your last day on earth. You actually set the house record for splitting a 1.75 liter of Canadian Club with another whiskey night soldier. Plus the drinks at the Albatross, plus the after bar party. Toss in the two packs of smokes, and John Belushi had nothing on you. Your partying became legendary, but so did your brooding about your girlfriend. You actually found yourself putting your head in the oven, but that was laughed off as something that you really didn't do, right? Anyway, you got back together with her, because that part of your life was already predetermined, I guess.

College came and went, and you got married right away. No one got married that young, not even back then! Of course, it was not that fantasy life you see in the movies, but reality never is. Reality is like that cold winter slap that hits you when you grab the morning paper. It stings, and you just long to get back inside. But you could not. Too late. The partying never really stopped, however, Nor did the late nights, nor did much else. Remember when you came down to Milwaukee to see me that one year that I lived down there? You got pissed at the wife, and just drove until you got to my door. Remember that pool game we played with the locals? We beat them, and they were waiting for us outside and we had to fight our way home? And then they tried to run you over with their car? Those days out of college were like a music video. So much fun, it was hard to believe they would ever stop.

Zach was born. Your life changed. Everything changed. Most everything. You started to finally settle down. Built the house in Lakeville. Then Mitch. Then Jake. Then the twins! Five boys! Now comes the mansion. You needed it just to hold all the toys. Remember when I switched careers to go into sales? You asked me if I wanted to come over there and build up your business with you. God, did we have fun. Opening up accounts left and right. We shared the same office and grew even closer. We would talk about everything. You were in my wedding, and were one of my brothers. You had the answer for everything. Business issues, family issues, life issues. I leaned on you heavily for advice.

A few years ago some storm cloud gathered. Your circle started to shrink. I could see it, but could not really do anything about it. Kind of like looking at a display on the sidewalk. Separation, but the cold glass ensures you only get so far. And the glass is unbreakable. First you turned your back on your best friend. No one turns their back on their best buddy. That is a clear violation of one of life's concrete rules. Then you turned your back on your parents. Again, something that someone does not do. Your response? "Fuck'em. I don't need them". Really?

The call then comes. You have done it. You had all the answers I was seeking. How do I make it in the business world? How do I handle marriage? How do I handle a screaming kid in the middle of the night? All your answers made perfect sense. But now you are not here. And we all have questions. And you cannot answer them. How are we supposed to find the answers for this? More importantly than me, how about your five children?

Pioneer Press VIP Update

As you may recall, I have been named a St. Paul Pioneer Press VIP. Because of my VIP status, I was informed via postcard that, for an extra 10 cents a day, my paper would be delivered right to my door (rather than right to my door, as it currently is). Well, a few interesting developments have happened since that postcard.

I fully intended to call and complain (bitch) about the added cost for a mythical service that I already am receiving but then I got my next bill for the paper. I noticed that the additional fee was not yet added. So, I decided to wait before calling and see where the paper ends up. The paper has been within a few feet of my porch door every day, but (oddly enough) not as near as the Star Tribune. The Star Tribune is neatly placed snug against my porch door each day. Now, this is not something that I like to admit. Being a St. Paul guy, I want the Pioneer Press to do well. I want it to do better than the Minneapolis-based Star Tribune even though I subscribe to both. You see, I need my Sid along with Soucheray. But, the Strib is also 50 cents a day so it really should be placed on my kitchen table each morning.

A weird thing happened, however, when I found out my Pioneer Press delivery guy also actually works at THE CHECK. By the way, once he heard that he was my delivery guy, the first thing he said was "I'd like to apologize for anything that has happened." I thought that was funny. Anyway, he's a good guy so I decided to ask him about the "VIP thing." His response was interesting. He had never heard of the "service." He didn't know that some people on his route were paying an extra fee for "delivery right to their door" and some were not. No clue.

So my question to you is: what kind of crazy, bunko scam is this? There is no question that I am cancelling the VIP service the first millisecond that I receive the charge on the bill. The delivery guys don't even know about it! I'm a little embarrassed for my beloved St. Paul Pioneer Press, people. This is the paper I have been reading my entire life, even as a lad in Eau Claire for God sakes. Back to the Don Riley days (The Bushers). If you need the extra dime a day, just ask. I'll pay it. But to mask it as some "service" is kind of sad.

This would be like THE CHECK saying, "Hey we'll sell you some nice laser checks but they are more money if you want a background color like blue or green!" Hey, wait a minute.......

What do you think about this "service?" What would you do?

Jeff

Saint Paul - SI's New Hockeytown U.S.A.

In the same issue of Sports Illustrated that named Brettfavre the Sportsman of the Year, a new Hockeytown U.S.A. is named. (Side note to Jase - all kidding aside, Favre is well-deserving of that honor, and should probably be named the NFL MVP). In his article in the latest edition of SI, Hockey writer Micheal Farber goes in search of the true Hockeytown U.S.A. Detroit held the honor previously, and the current contestants came down to Detroit, Philadelphia, Buffalo and St. Paul. The winner, and new Hockeytown U.S.A.?

St. Paul.

Here is what Farber has to say about his choice:

The Wild has sold every ticket to every game since it entered the NHL as an expansion team in 2000, but it has never tried to bigfoot hockey in a city that was home to America's iconic coach, Herb Brooks; the No. 2 U.S.-born career NHL scorer, South St. Paul's Phil Housley; the only cartoonist to draw a Zamboni-driving bird, Charles Schulz; and the leading state high school tournament in the nation. This is the unwritten hockey schedule in the Twin Cities: boys' hockey Tuesday night, girls' hockey Thursday night, the University of Minnesota Friday and Saturday nights. Boys and girls also play on Saturday afternoon. It is no coincidence that the Wild often plays on Wednesday and Sunday. This is a franchise respectful of the game, aware of its niche and almost obsequious in its treatment of fans. Minnesota high school hockey jerseys ring the outer concourse of the arena. Pictures of season-ticket holders appear on game tickets. The Wild even employs a full-time hockey curator to protect and promote the state's hockey heritage.

That's pretty cool considering that the previous franchise, the beloved North Stars, relocated to the hockey hotbed of Texas due to combination of the evil Norm Green and the short-sighted local politicians. Sometimes it takes losing something to realise how valuable it was. This is the case with hockey in the Twin Cities. More from Farber:

Now Minnesotans are buying what the Wild is selling. Season tickets are capped at 16,500; the waiting list is 7,500. There are 32 stations on the team's radio network, extending through the Dakotas, into Iowa and Wisconsin and even Thunder Bay, Ont. NHL hockey again appears entrenched, despite the many other options available.

That is what I like to hear.

Peace from Hockeytown, U.S.A.,

Jeff

The Vikes

A few weeks back, the Vikings played their worst collective game in over 10 years and lost to the Packers 34-0. Adrian Peterson got hurt and looked like he might be lost for the season. The team sat at 3-6 and it looked like they were on their way to a last-place finish. Needless to say, I was a little down on the squad. I'm kind of at a loss to explain what has happened since that time.

Sure, they beat the Oakland Raiders at home which is somewhat expected. Then, however, they proceeded to dismantle the Giants at New York 41-17, and destroy the Lions 42-10 at the Dome. It's not so much the outcome of these games that has surprised me. Here is what has surprised me:

1. Adrian Peterson did not play in 2 of the 3 victories. Antione Winfied did not play in all 3.
2. Tavarius Jackson has not only looked competent, he has looked confident. He can suddenly complete slant passes.
3. They have discovered a pass rush.
4. The play of the linebackers has been outstanding, especially E.J. Henderson.
5. They have consistently converted on 3rd down.
6. They have not only attempted, but converted, multiple trick plays.
7. They have not committed stupid, untimely penalties.
8. The play of the young wide receivers, particularly 21 year-old Sidney Rice. has been great.
9. Most importantly and amazingly, Brad Childress does not seem over matched. The play-calling has been..........good.

OK. Is this the "purple kool-aid" moment of 2007? Have they temporarily crossed over into a parallel universe? Possibly. The Vikes have been known to "tease" their fans at some time each year, before the "other shoe drops." Sure, the Vikes sit at 6-6, and the best that they can hope for is a Wild Card playoff berth. Is it time for the "big let down?"

I believe the upcoming game against lowly San Francisco will tell you more about this team than any other game this season. The Vikings enter a game, on the road, against an opponent that they are expected to beat. The game has playoff implications. If they blow this one and lay an egg against the 49ers, it's time pack it in folks. If the Vikings win this game, however, they will sit at 7-6 and control their own destiny. I can't believe that I just typed those words about the 2007 Minnesota Vikings. My preseason prediction was 4-12.

I must admit that I like what I see from some of the young Vikings. T-Jack, Chad Greenway, Sidney Rice, Aundrae Allison, E.J. Henderson, Cedric Griffin. The one thing that makes this year seem a little different, of course, is Adrian Peterson. He is the Real Deal, and if he stays healthy, there is finally hope for the future.

Has the purple kool-aid, once again, gone to my head? I guess we'll see.


Peace,


Jeff

Sasquatch's Cousin (Kind of a Dork)

As usual, I have been scouring the news for more proof of the existence of The Sasquatch. It turns out that Sasquatch's cousin, the Yeti, has been in the news lately. For you Bigfoot-family virgins out there, the Yeti is a ape-like creature that is said to live in Tibet and Nepal. The Yeti also goes by another name that I am sure that you have heard before - The Abdominal Snowman. This is because the creature exists in the snowy, mountainous regions of the aforementioned countries. By the way, whoever coined the phrase "abdominal" for this creature really picked the right catch-phrase. What else have you ever heard described as "abdominal" other than The Snowman? Well, maybe some Vikings play calling earlier this year, but not much else. But the name has stuck. I looked up the word in the dictionary and it means "odious, loathsome, detestable." Wow, not good. But that makes sense because the Yeti has always got the short-end of the stick when it comes to Sasquatch lore. He's kind of a dork, but more on that later.


The Yeti has been in the news lately because ape-like footprints have been discovered near Mount Everest. Here is the low-down from a story by Gopal Sharma (who else?) for MSNBC.com:

KATMANDU, Nepal - Members of a TV production team investigating the existence of the legendary Yeti in Nepal said Friday that they have found footprints intriguing enough to merit further investigation.

The team of nine producers from "Destination Truth," armed with infrared cameras, spent a week in the icy Khumbu region where Mount Everest is located and found the footprints on the bank of the Manju River at an elevation of 9,350 feet (2,850 meters).

One of the three footprints found on Wednesday is about 1 foot (30 centimeters) long, with an appearance similar to those shown in sketches of the purported apelike creature, the team said.

Of course, you have the "it's a bear crowd," but not according to archaeologist Josh Gates:

"I don't believe it to be a bear. It is something of a mystery for us. This print is so pristine, so good, that I am very intrigued by this," said Gates, flanked by his team members.

That is all fine and good but I must say, and lets not mince words here, nobody really cares about The Yeti. If this was a story about Sasquatch footprints found in, say, Northern California, everyone would be freaking out (no question). But Nepal? Who cares. Who is going to Nepal soon? Nobody. Plus, most Yeti sightings are by freaky, wizard-looking people who live in the mountains. People who live in the mountains are probably crazy, and don't have as much credibility as people who see Bigfoot and live in the woods.

When I think of The Sasquatch, I think of a powerful, 8-foot muscular creature roaming the forest. When I think of the Yeti, visions of a tubby, white Orangutan come to mind, probably hiding in a cave. Actually the Yeti, or Abominable Snowman, does have one famous image. Here it is:

Yes, it's the lovable "bumble" from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. He was mean at first, but then was tamed and actually put the star on the Christmas Tree at the end of the show. Nice. Would The Sasquatch put the star on the Christmas tree? No. He would DESTROY the Christmas tree. Therein lies one of the fundamental differences between the two.

So, I can't get too fired up about the Yeti footprints discovered in the mountains of Nepal. They'll probably lead right to a cowering creature hiding in a cave. I'll keep searching for Sasquatch news.

Peace,

Jeff

Purple Kool-Aid Time?

Wait a minute here. Vikings 42 - Lions 10? That's 3 wins in a row. AP looks healthy. T-Jack actually looks like an NFL (or CFL, at least) Quarterback. Is it time to drink the Purple Kool-Aid?

I will have more to say about this later. Now, The Boy and I are going to attend the Wild game against the hated (and dirty and cheap) Vancouver Canucks. Should be a battle. Matt Cooke sucks.

Peace,

Jeff

UPDATE: We just returned from the X, and the Wild thwarted the hated Canucks 2-1 to take over sole possession of 1st Place in the Norris, uh, Northwest Division. A good time was had by all. By the way this man is my new hero:

His name is Aaron Voros. Once in a great while, a guy is called up from the minors who just can't be sent back. This guy agitates, scraps, camps in front of the net. All good stuff. And he scored the winning goal tonight. Jacques Lemaire loves him. He said in the post-game wrap up that every time Voros scores a goal he responds "like it's the first goal he's ever scored." I like that. He's another good shot from the game tonight. Voros is the guy screaming at the hated Canuck on the ground:
Good times. Have a good night.

Jeff

One Year Later

I hope you are sitting down for this. Today, December 1st, 2007, is the one-year anniversary of What Jeff Thinks. Yes, I know that is amazing. It has been one year of incredible insight, rants, visions, tirades, innuendos, off-base prognostications, inaccuracies, and attempts at humor. There have been 157 total posts, including my first one on December 1, 2006. I am quite proud of some posts, and others are complete crap.

Obviously sports, sports stadiums, The Sasquatch, & tunes have been the major topics that I have written about. As you may recall, this blog was created by my wife because she was tired of listening to my rants about the aforementioned topics (especially, at the time, the Twins stadium). Well, this blog has served me well in the "blowing off steam" department. There have been some great conversations in the comments sections, too. I'd like to thank everyone who has taken the time to read the blog, and those who have added comments. I'd also like to thank the "spell-check feature" on Blogger which has saved me from embarrassment many times. A special thank-you, however, goes out to "the regulars" whose comments have become an integral part of What Jeff Thinks. Some of the comments are better than the actual posts!

I have to admit there have been a few occasions that I have pondered shutting the blog down, but then something happens in the news that "I have to write about." So, here's to Year II of What Jeff Thinks. I'm sure there will be much to write about. The continued building of the Twins stadium, more proof of The Sasquatch (as if more is needed), concert reviews, putting plastic on windows, etc. I'd even allow for "guest posters." If you have something you'd like to rant about, send it to me. I'll post it as a "guest blogger," unless it is much funnier than anything that I have ever written. Then, we'll see.

Anyway, thanks again for Year I.

Peace,

Jeff

Lucy - What A Hag

I watched my all-time favorite Christmas show last night with The Kids - A Charlie Brown Christmas. To me, the Christmas season does not start until A Charlie Brown Christmas is aired on network television. I love this show. It was written in 1965, one year before I was born, and I've been watching it every winter since the early '70's. There are a couple lessons to be learned for all in this tale. The first is the true meaning of Christmas. The second lesson just hit me this year - 2007 - for the first time:

All the girls in the Peanuts gang are serious hags.

Now let's think about this. Some girls are nicer than others. Sally, Charlie's sister, is not too bad. But how about Violet, Frieda and.......Lucy. I'll get back to Lucy later. She's could be the subject a whole stack of psychiatric textbooks.

Let's start with Violet. The show starts with Charlie lamenting the fact that Christmas has become too commercialized, and the fact that he was not invited to Violet's neighborhood Christmas party. The first words uttered by uptight Violet in the show are when she gleefully proclaims "Well I didn't invite you Charlie Brown!" Screw you Violet. Who wants to go to your boring party anyway? Later in the show, Violet proclaims that Charlie Brown "put on the worst Christmas play ever." When Charlie tries his best to pick out a Christmas tree for the play, Violet chastizes him by saying "boy, are you stupid," and "I told you he'd goof it up." Shut up, Violet. What a witch.

And then there is Frieda. You may not have heard of Frieda, but she's the pretentious lass with the "naturally curly hair." Now you know who I am talking about. Can you just hear her whining about her "naturally curly hair" before the play? I know you can. Frieda spends most of the 30 minute show riding Pig Pen about his messy appearance. Hey, Pig Pen is cool. Lay off Pig Pen. She keeps on whining about the dust from Pig Pen's clothes "taking the curl out of her naturally curly hair." She hands him a mirror and calls him (and I quote) "a complete mess." To which Pig Pen replies (with the best line of the show) "On the contrary, I didn't think I looked THAT good." Right on Pig Pen.

Finally, there is......Lucy. She should be the subject of college Psychology classes. How does Linus put up with her? She's constantly riding him about his favorite blanket. Constantly giving him "FIVE GOOD REASONS" to get rid of it. She rides Schroeder about Beethoven "not being that good" because "he does not have his picture on bubble gum cards." Shut the hell up, Lucy. What do you know? That is nothing compared to her treatment of good ol' Charlie Brown, however.

Lucy decides to put Charlie in charge of the entire Christmas play, even though she knows that might kill him. She then gets on his case because it doesn't go well (what a shock)! Lucy chides Charlie to "do something right for a change!" Wow - pure evil.

Lucy's true colors, and psychosis, is revealed in the following passage, however. I actually had to fish out our old VHS copy of A Charlie Brown Christmas and write this down word for word. Get this - when Lucy asks Charlie what part she will play in the Christmas production she exclaims the following:

"You're not going to let all this beauty go to waste!? You do think I'm beautiful, don't you Charlie Brown? You didn't answer me right way. If you really thought I was beautiful, you would have spoken right away. I know when I've been insulted!"

Folks, Alfred Hitchcock never wrote anything that messed up. Lucy is crazy, psychotic, and ready to snap at any time. And who is going to bear the brunt of her rage when she snaps? Probably Linus and his blanket.

What do you think about this? Am I off base, or are these gals evil? Let me know.

Peace,

Jeff

Parallel Universes

The Vikings crossed over into a parallel universe a few weeks back when they beat the San Diego Chargers at the Dome. Well, they entered that same alternate universe today out in New York. I like that universe. The defense intercepted three Eli Manning passes and returned them for touchdowns, helping the Vikes beat the Giants 41-17. The Giants are supposed to be one of the top teams in the NFC, which tells you more about the NFC than the Giants. Can the Vikings, at 5-6, start thinking about the possibility of the playoffs? (insert Jim Mora's voice here - Playoffs?? Playoffs!?) Maybe Coach Chilly has a Master Plan.....

But that is not the alternate universe that I want to talk about. I want to talk about the universe that Torii Hunter has slipped into. I have been writing quite a bit about Torii Hunter leaving the Twins lately, and I don't blame him for leaving. But check out the quote from Torii in Sid's column today:

It will be hard for the Twins to attract free agents, Hunter added, because the new stadium lacks a roof.

"People aren't even thinking about this," he said. "I wouldn't play in Minnesota unless my career was at an end and I had to go to Minnesota to play the game. ... People think that's not true -- that's 100 percent accurate. This is coming from a player, so I'm telling you."

Ummmmm........what? This from the guy who was quoted as thinking of leaving Minnesota because of the Metrodome's fake turf? Now, he's already missing the roof? Folks, has it come to this? Minnesota and the Twins are finally, after a decade-long battle, building a new outdoor stadium (to help them earn revenue and attract free agents) and it's already hurting them with attracting free agents? The hole is barely dug, for God sakes. Have Major League players become this sissified? Will it be a little too cold for the guys, or windy? Might it sprinkle? No wonder Hunter signed with the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim of Southern California of the United States of America of North America. It's always 80 and sunny in Anaheim. No breeze, no rain - ever. No pesky clouds. Has it come to this?

That, to me, is one remarkably sad quote from Hunter. If he is correct, we are entering an age in which Major League Ballplayers apparently have to play in absolutely perfect conditions. Where have you gone Joe DiMaggio, indeed? Hell, where have you gone Kent Hrbek?

Hunter was great on and off the field for the Twins, but he has had a few quotes from time to time that make you wonder what he is thinking. Or what universe he has slipped into.

Peace,

Jeff

Sports Ramblings....

It's a day off from THE CHECK today, and I am still feeling the after-effects of too much turkey and stuffing. That means it is a good time to put some more thoughts down on the blog. Here goes:

1. There has been much wailing and gnashing of teeth from the public in the aftermath of Torii Hunter signing with the Angels. Apparently, StarTribune columnist Jim Souhan and I are in complete agreement on the situation. Maybe he reads What Jeff Thinks?? Ah.........no. Here is what he had to say in today's edition of the paper:

The Twins were right to let Hunter leave, and he didn't intend to stay, regardless of the public relations campaign staged by both sides.

A billionaire owner running a profitable team that will enter a new stadium in 2010 can afford $90 million over five years for a power-hitting center fielder. That doesn't make it a wise investment.

Big-money, long-term contracts can destroy a franchise. Hunter insisted on a five- or six-year contract. The Twins didn't mind paying Hunter $15 million a year while he's in his prime; they balked at paying even more for a 36-year-old corner outfielder with a battered body, which is what Hunter figures to be in 2011.

And here is what Souhan said about Johan Santana:

{Losing Hunter)makes it imperative that they make Johan Santana their new-millennium Frank Viola, and trade him for players who can help them contend in the new stadium.

Keep Santana, and he will consume a huge percentage of the payroll and, every five days, will have a chance to lose 3-2.

Hunter's departure means there are no front-line players remaining from the 2002 team that broke the Twins' playoff drought. They blew it when they let David Ortiz go; otherwise, their decisions have been vindicated.

Doug Mientkiewicz, Luis Rivas, Cristian Guzman, Corey Koskie, Jacque Jones, A.J. Pierzynski, Eddie Guardado, LaTroy Hawkins, Eric Milton and Joe Mays all were cut loose when they became more expensive than they were worth.

At $90 million for a 32-year-old, Hunter now is more expensive, in the context of a middle-market team with payroll limits, than he is worth.

No need to get emotional -- Hunter is a wonderful guy and was a fine player for the Twins, and they were right to let him go.

Amen to that. I've always loved Jim Souhan.

2. The Green Bay Packers are 10-1. THE VISION is coming true. Do not mess with the supernatural. The only question left to be answered is whether the Packers will wear home green or road white when they play the Patriots in the Super Bowl. As I have reminded you, the vision first took place after the Philadelphia Eagles muffed a punt late in the game against the Pack. It was a moment of clarity like I have never experienced before. How this will play out over the rest of the year is also becoming clearer. Here you go:

Step 1: Pack wins NFC Norris Division. What once was a odd-sounding "when monkeys fly out of my ass" statement is now 99.999% FACT.

Step 2: Pack earns home-field advantage throughout the playoffs when Dallas chokes and loses at Washington on Sunday, December 30th. The Redskins would love nothing better than knocking their arch-rival out of having home field advantage in the playoff. Mark it down - it will happen.

Step 3: The Pack breezes in their first playoff game against some jokers like Tampa or Seattle. No contest. Over by half-time.

Step 4: The Packers and Cowboys meet in the NFC Championship game in Lambeau. It will be a very, very cold day and the game will be dubbed ICE BOWL II. Seriously. The Pack will win late in the game when Brettfavre scores on a quarterback sneak over center. I am not kidding. It will look a lot like this:

Step 5: Green Bay will take on the Patriots in the Super Bowl. A Patriots blow-out, right? NO! Remember THE VISION - Tom Brady sustains a leg injury in the AFC Championship game that keeps him out of the game. Here it is folks: The Packers will beat New England and back up quarterback Matt Cassel in the Super Bowl. Learn it, know it, live it.

Folks, I am just a vehicle for THE VISION. The messenger, so to speak.

Have a good one.

Jeff

Happy Thanksgiving Torii

Thanksgiving came early for Twins center-fielder Torii Hunter this year. And Christmas. The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (of California of the western United States) have signed Hunter to a 5-year, $90 million deal. If I do my Eau Claire public school math correctly, that is $18 million per year for the 5 years. Torii can now afford to feed his family.

Hunter, who had become the "face of the Twins franchise," will be almost 39 years old when the contract expires. Folks, the time has come to say "see ya later" to the Twins center fielder and "thanks for the memories." I wish Torii well, but I don't blame the Twins for not signing him. I would not have given Hunter a 5-year contract. The Twins were reportedly offering 3 years at $45 million, a paltry $15 million per year. I also don't blame Hunter for waiting for and accepting the best deal. Gone are the days when the Hrbeks and Pucketts of the world take less money to play for fans that love them and stay with one franchise. Professional sports have become a game for mercenaries. Hunter has always been a great defensive center-fielder, a slightly above-average hitter, and a quote machine for reporters. He's also nearing the end of his career. My thought has always been that Hunter would sign with the Texas Rangers because he is from Dallas. He has said in interviews that he would love to play "at home" with his family near him. Obviously, "The Benjamins from Anaheim" speak louder than "the Hunters from Texas" in this case (Sorry, I had to get in a little rip, there). I don't blame Hunter - really.

The Twins have never been a franchise to hold on to their "superstars" forever. The aforementioned Kent Hrbek and Kirby Puckett are exceptions to the rule. This is a team that has gone through many "cycles" of players. The Twins have traded (or lost to free agency) the likes of Bert Blyleven, Rod Carew, Tom Brunansky, Chuck Knoblauch, Gary Gaetti, Jeff Reardon, A.J. Pierzinski, Frank Viola, Jaque Jones, etc., etc., etc. They usually end up improving their team in the long run through schrewd drafting and good trades. I can only hope the Twins take the money that they are saving by not resigning Hunter (and the greenbacks from the new stadium) and invest it back into the team. They need to resign Justin Morneau and lock up some of the young pitchers on the team. They also need to go out and sign a third baseman and a couple of players who can hit. Carl Pohlad simply cannot pocket the money he is saving by not resigning Hunter.

Lastly, the time has come to trade Johan Santana. If some of the rumors are true, the Dodgers, Yankees, Mets and Red Sox are offering some major young talent if they can be guaranteed to sign Santana to a long-term deal. He must waive his no-trade clause, however. This needs to happen. With the Twins luck, Santana will blow out his elbow if they sign him to a long-term deal. Trade him if the deal is right, but don't give him away. I would try and load up on young talent now for the new stadium in 2010. It's time for the Twins to start the next cycle.

Peace,

Jeff

Thanksgiving

The Thanksgiving season is once again upon us. Like most years, I am preparing for a day of watching parades with the kids, going to my sisters house in White Bear Lake to be with family and eat copious amounts of food, and laying on the couch to watch football. That is what I call Thanksgiving. The day, of course, is intended to be a time to "give thanks" for the good things in a person's life (thus the name). I usually end of feeling a little guilty each Thanksgiving because I realize that I spend most of my year worrying about crap like the house being messy, the car I drive, whether or not some sports team beat another and on and on and on. I often take for granted the fact that I am extremely lucky to have a wonderful wife, outstanding kids and extended family, and great life-long friends. I am healthy (Zocor aside) and damn good-looking. I can even sort of play the bass guitar. I am a lucky guy.

Thanksgiving also makes think about a few friends in my life who I have lost touch with. Everyone out there has a few of those friends who, for various reasons, contact is lost with. Days become weeks, weeks become years. It happens to everyone. I know that, most times, one person is not solely to blame for these situations, as most phones allow for both making outgoing calls along with accepting incoming calls. But, it kind of bums me out nonetheless.

Maybe this year I will pick up the phone and call a couple of those friends rather than just thinking about it. I recently wrote a post on the subject of my favorite song lyrics. As long as we're on the Thanksgiving topic, here is one of my favorites by Neil Young:

One of these days,I'm gonna sit down and write a long letter
To all the good friends I've known
And I'm gonna try
And thank them all for the good times together.
Though so apart we've grown.

One of these days,I'm gonna sit downand write a long letter
To all the good friends I've known
One of these days,one of these days, one of these days
And it won't be long, it won't be long.

And I'm gonna thank
That old country fiddler
And all those rough boys
Who play that rock 'n' roll
I never tried to burn any bridges
Though I know I let some good things go.

One of these days,I'm gonna sit down and write a long letter
To all the good friends I've known
One of these days,one of these days,one of these days
And it won't be long, it won't be long.

From down in L.A.
All the way to Nashville
From New York City
To my Canadian prairie home
My friends are scattered
Like leaves from an old maple.
Some are weak, some are strong.

One of these days
I'm gonna sit down and write a long letter
To all the good friends
I've known
One of these days,one of these days,one of these days
And it won't be long, it won't be long.

Happy Thanksgiving,

Jeff

Some Interesting Blog Factoids From A V.I.P.

I was reading the St. Paul Pioneer Press the other day as part of my constant search for blog fodder. It's still a quarter, you know. Twenty-five frickin' cents - quite a deal. You can barely buy a gumball for 25 cents these days. And before I get into the main topic of this post, I need to speak about that subject a little more.

Because I am a subscriber to the St. Paul Pioneer Press, I received a post card last week that says I have been "added" to a new program call "V.I.P delivery" for an extra 10 cents a day. That means the paper will be - get this - 35 cents. For an extra dime, they will deliver the paper "to my door." Once again, I have been "added" to that service, but I can call and decline. Now wait a minute here. Where do they deliver my paper today? To my door, of course. Sure, there are a few errant throws, but it's normally right there on the stoop each morning. If I call and "decline" this VIP delivery service, where in God's name is the paper going to end up? In the street? On the roof? My neighbor's house, perhaps? Through a window?? I think this whole VIP thing is a scam, but I'm a little scared to call and decline because of the possible ramifications. Especially with winter coming on. I don't want to have to walk out and retrieve that paper in the middle of the street in my skivvies in a blizzard. Let's just say the paper is 35 cents and call it a day.

Anyway, that is not what I am here to talk about. I came across an article by Patrick Reardon called "If Your Blog Dies, Will Anyone But You Know?" That caught my eye. Reardon interviewed Derek Gordon, vice president for marketing for the San Francisco-based Technorati about blogging. Here are some interesting factoids that I learned:

--There are 109.2 million active blogs in the world today, up from 94 million in August. That is a lot of opinions on a lot of crap.

--There is 1 blog for every 151 people world-wide. That is 1 blog for every 23 people with Internet access.

--OK - get this. Just over 99% of those 109.2 million blogs get NO HITS from readers in the course of a year. The vast majority of blogs exist in a state of total or near-total obscurity.

That last factoid actually puts a little spring in my step. Now, I'm no Shakespeare, but at least "What Jeff Thinks" gets a few hits now and then, and doesn't exist in total obscurity. Near-total obscurity maybe, but not total. Obscurity is bad. At least Jase, Tony8489, Dools, Tito Jackson, The Pantless Wonder, Freealonzo, quite a few "Anonymous's," and various other readers seem to give a little bit of a damn about What Jeff Thinks. I'd like to thank each and every one of you for keeping this blog out of "the depths of obscurity."

Boy, that would be a lot of work for nothing.

Peace,

Jeff

My Favorite Song Lyrics of All-Time - Vol, II

A couple of months back, I wrote a post about my favorite song lyrics of all-time (volume 1). It generated a pretty good response and some great favorites from readers. Well, it's time for Volume II. Here you go. As always, let me know what you think:

Been living on faithless street all by myself
Work your whole life for someone else
Trying to find sanction, Christ above man
He never shed his peace on this land
So I started this damn country band
'cause punk rock was too hard to sing.
WHISKEYTOWN - "Faithless Street"

Frankly, Mr. Shankly, this position I've held
It pays my way, and it corrodes my soul
I want to leave, you will not miss me
I want to go down in musical history

...but sometimes I'd feel more fulfilled
Making Christmas cards with the mentally ill
I want to live and i want to love
I want to catch something that I might be ashamed of

Frankly, Mr. Shankly, this position I've held
It pays my way and it corrodes my soul
Oh, I didn't realise that you wrote poetry
I didn't realise you wrote such bloody awful poetry, Mr. Shankly

Frankly, Mr. Shankly, since you ask
You are a flatulent pain in the arse
I do not mean to be so rude
Still, i must speak frankly, Mr. Shankly
oh, give us money
THE SMITHS - "Frankly Mr. Shankly"

Pushing thru the market square, so many mothers sighing
News had just come over, we had five years left to cry in
News guy wept and told us, earth was really dying
Cried so much his face was wet, then I knew he was not lying

I heard telephones, opera house, favourite melodies
I saw boys, toys electric irons and t.v.s
My brain hurt like a warehouse, it had no room to spare
I had to cram so many things to store everything in there
And all the fat-skinny people, and all the tall-short people
And all the nobody people, and all the somebody people
I never thought Id need so many people

A girl my age went off her head, hit some tiny children
If the black hadn't a-pulled her off, I think she would have killed them
A soldier with a broken arm, fixed his stare to the wheels of a Cadillac
A cop knelt and kissed the feet of a priest, and a queer threw up at the sight of that
I think I saw you in an ice-cream parlour, drinking milk shakes cold and long
Smiling and waving and looking so fine, don't think you knew you were in this song

And it was cold and it rained so I felt like an actor
And I thought of ma and I wanted to get back there
Your face, your race, the way that you talk
I kiss you, youre beautiful, I want you to walk

Weve got five years, stuck on my eyes
Five years, what a surprise
Weve got five years, my brain hurts a lot
Five years, thats all weve got
DAVID BOWIE - "Five Years"

Been saving now for over a year
Let's pack the kids get outta here
We'll leave behind our troubles for a week
We'll borrow the pop-up from Phyllis and Steve
Just tell the boss I gotta leave
Be the best week of our lives as I can tell
We'll take our dream vacation in the Dells

We'll see the robot world and the water show
Go anywhere you wanna go
Circus world Museum in Baraboo
We'll play mini-golf at the Jellystone
And we'll finally see that house of foam
And if the kids wanna buy a t-shirt what the hell
It's our dream vacation in the Dells

And at night when the kids is all asleep
Then off to the lounge for a nightcap we can sneak
I know our lives they ain't the stuff of dreams
But for one full week we can live like kings and queens

So let's board the dogs lock the door
We'll roll down Interstate 94
Be the best week of our lives I can tell
We'll take our dream vacation in the Dells
GEAR DADDIES - "Dream Vacation"

I'd love to live where it's always August
or late September, just before school
One warm day now and then
Just to go swimmin'
Other than that - jean jacket weather
OL' YELLER - "Jean Jacket Weather"

That's it for now.

Peace,

Jeff

Feelings

A couple of quick notes:

1. I know Packer fans love their team, but this is a bit much. Check out the guy on the right, and "where" he is grabbing. Can someone please explain this to me? Now, if this was Brettfavre, this would be perfectly understandable, but Ruvell Martin?

2. Stephon "Starbury" Marbury is unhappy. Yes, you read that correctly. Never before has a person who gets paid over $20 MILLION a year to bounce a ball been so consistently unhappy as Marbury. Hey, it's a tough life. He skipped his last game against Phoenix (and got fined $200 grand) and flew back to New York to sulk. He has been benched by Head Coach Isiah Thomas. Let's face it, Starbury has had kind of a rough year. Here is some background from a report on espn.com:

Marbury is still one of the Knicks' best players, averaging 15.2 points and 6.8 assists. But he and Thomas clashed early last season after Thomas benched him in the second halves of two games, and Marbury caused the Knicks some more headaches this summer.He behaved erratically during a televised interview, then testified in a sexual harassment trial against Thomas and Madison Square Garden that he had a sexual encounter in his truck with a team intern, smiling and singing on his way out of the courthouse.
Marbury also was forced to apologize after defending Michael Vick's participation in dogfighting.

It sounds like Stephon has some dirt on Thomas, however:

"Isiah has to start me," Marbury reportedly said, according to the Daily News. "I've got so much [stuff] on Isiah and he knows it. He thinks he can [get] me. But I'll [get] him first. You have no idea what I know."

That's the spirit, Steph. Love to see that camaraderie between player and coach! Steph must have some pictures pertaining to the alleged sexual harassment charges against Thomas.

Only in the NBA, baby.

Jeff

Enough Whining by Me! Let's revisit 1977!

Ok, enough. I am sick of hearing myself whine about sports. That's enough of that crap.

I got an e-mail from my sister (that would be What Jeff Think's sister) that had photos from the 1977 JC Penny catalog. Outstanding. The height of leisure suits. And those of you who know me realize that I am into leisure suits. I like that way they fit and feel. These pictures solidify my belief that I should have been born about 15 years earlier so I could have experienced The '70's in the height of the Disco, leisure suit craze. I would have feathered my hair big-time and grew a sweet mustache and boogied the night away. Check these out and you'll know what I am talking about:

Look at this and tell me with a straight face that I would not make this look good. If it gets hot, you just lose the the coat for some serious comfort. Next....

Speaking of hot, this little number takes the cake. And, it's got collars so you can wear it at the golf course OR at THE CHECK. That leads us to....

...This matching "his 'n' her" set. Sweet and doubly sexy. You could play hide 'n' seek and lay on the bed sheet and nobody would ever find you. Or you could trade shirts with your honey and nobody would know the difference. These would have matched some wallpaper at my parents house in the '70's, by the way. And lastly....

...possibly the greatest shirt that I have ever seen. Kind of an "Urban Cowboy" theme for those hot disco nights. Once again, if it gets too hot, you simply unbutton that middle section to unleash the manly chest hair and serious gold necklace. Nice.

No question, I should have been born 15 years earlier.

Groovy,

Jeff

Nice

Boy, did Chilly have 'em ready to play today. After crossing into a parallel universe last week and actually defeating San Diego, the Minnesota Vikings were back today to embarrassing the entire State of Minnesota. Now this is what I am used to. I'm not going to spend a lot of time on this, folks. As I am writing this, the Packers are beating the Vikings 34 - 0. I was a little off on my prediction that the Vikes would lose on a last-second pass. Even I could not anticipate this type of ineptitude. They were dominated in every facet of the game. A few things are apparent:

1. I do not experience one ounce of pleasure from watching football. Once again, I am three hours closer to death. I could have been kayaking or skydiving or something. Why do I do this?

2. The Vikings need 3 completely different quarterbacks next year. Or next week, even. They. Are. All. Terrible.

3. This may have been the worst game the Vikings played in the last 10 years. Now that is saying something. There is a lot of competition for that honor.

4. Did Darren Sharper play today?

5. What do you bet the doctors "find" something in Adrienne Peterson's knee this week that is serious. And by the way, if somebody would have put that same hit on Brettfavre, they would have been called for unsportsmanlike conduct and probably kicked out of the game.

6. Watch a replay of the 4th-quarter pass that TWO Vikings deflected in the end zone that somehow ended up in the hands of a Packer for a touchdown and tell me that the Packers are not living a charmed existence. But, you know what? You make your own luck. Folks, the Packers are going to WIN the Super Bowl. I called it after Week 3. There is nothing that can be done to stop this supernatural train now. And Brettfavre will be the MVP on the NFL.

Count on it.

Jeff

Saturday Morning Tidbits

Happy Saturday everyone.

Tidbit #1. I read an article in the Star Tribune this morning stating that the four Hennepin County Commissioners who voted in favor of the Twins stadium are receiving threats from "certain" anti-stadium members of the public. The only thing that surprises me about this news is that it took so long for a few of these unstable, anti-stadium wing-nuts to react with violent threats. Maybe the fact that the construction of the stadium infrastructure is now actually visible was the last straw for these folks. Apparently, all four Commissioners have received threatening letters to their houses, one claiming that "judgement day is coming." Nice.

In addition, Commissioner Mike Opat was recently mugged outside of his Robbinsdale home. So far, the crime has been called random, but I wouldn't put this act past a few of the anti-stadium freaks. After all, if you don't get your way, name-calling , threats and violence is the way to react, right? Granted, many of the anti-stadium posts that I've read on other blogs are from well-spoken, level-headed people who just happen to have a different opinion than me on the topic. A few posters, however, come across as simply having a personal vendetta against these Commissioners. If I was the cops, I would be interested in "questioning" a few of these guys after what happened to Opat.

Tidbit #2: I have been asked quite frequently if I think the Vikings will beat the Packers this weekend. Well, no I don't. I believe the game will be close, however. In fact, I believe the Vikings will hold a three point lead with less than 4 minutes to play. They will have the ball and be forced to punt to the Packers after some bad Chilly play-calling. Brettfavre (one word) will attempt to drive the Pack down the field for the tying field goal and send the game to overtime. BUT the Pack will WIN when Favre hits Greg Jennings on a slant. Jennings will split and get behind the safeties. Jennings will "take it to the house" with less than 10 seconds remaining. Lambeau Leap ensues, 24-20 Packers. Supernatural. Count on it.

Tidbit #3: I've been listening to Jason Isbell's "Sirens of the Ditch" quite a bit lately, the first solo effort from the lead singer of The Drive By Truckers. Isbell continues with the "Alt-Country" tradition of the Truckers, who have been called "the Southern Replacements." Check it out if you are looking for some new tunes - it's excellent. Highlights include the Mellencamp-like rocker "Brand New Kind of Actress" and the twangy ballad "Dress Blues" about a soldier who does not return home from Iraq. If you like The Drive By Truckers, you will love this album.

Peace,

Jeff

A Tale of Two Franchises

I have often written about how, in this town, the Vikings could take a lesson in Public Relations from the Wild. Or simply hire them as consultants to check in with before they act or speak. Well, here is yet another example of what I am talking about.

Exhibit A: Wes Walz, one of the two remaining "original members" of the Wild, asks for a few days off to tend to "personal matters." The team grants Walz, one of the Wild fan favorites, the time off. "A few days" has now turned into "an indefinite leave of absence." Apparently, nobody on the team knows exactly why Walz needs this time off, although it has been rumored that he is pondering retirement. Here is what Head Coach Jaques Lemaire told the St. Paul Pioneer Press:

"It's really surprising that nothing has leaked so far, and that we don't know the reason he is gone and not coming back," coach Jacques Lemaire said today after practice. "If he needs time, that's fine, but I don't know that. I want him to take time, but I'd like to know what's going on."

It's not as if the Wild couldn't use Wes Walz right now. Pavol Demitra and Marian Gaborik, the Groin Brothers, continue to miss time due to injury. The Wild could use Walz. But, here is what team captain Brian Rolston had to say:

"He's meant a lot to this organization, and his work ethic is superior," Rolston said. "Whatever time he needs, we'll give it to him, no problems."

In other words, it would be great to have Walz back, but some things are more important that sports. The organization will give him the time off he needs.

So, what's up with the Vikes?

Exhibit B: Wide Receiver Troy Williamson leaves the team for a week to attend the funeral of his grandmother. The Vikings dock his pay $26,000. After the death last week of his maternal grandmother, Williamson rejoined the Vikings yesterday. He apparently was very close to his grandmother, who helped raise him and taught him to cook and drive. Williamson lamented that he could not spend more time with his family, particularly his brother Carlton, who is still in a coma after a car accident, even after the club withheld his paycheck. Here is what Williamson told the St. Paul Pioneer Press:

"I don't care if (the Vikings) would have took my pay for the rest of the year, I was going home," Williamson said. "It wouldn't have mattered to me. No matter what (Brad Childress) would have said, if I had to stay up here or not, I would have been at my house (in South Carolina) for that week." Williamson declined to comment, when asked if Childress was understanding.

Yeah, I bet Chilly was really understanding. He seems like a touchy, feely guy. What makes matters even more confounding is (lets not mince words here) Williamson can't catch the ball. And he's a wide receiver. Let me get this straight - the Wild grant a "needed player" an indefinite leave of absence and the Vikings dock a guy who can't catch $26 grand for attending his grandma's funeral.

Nice public relations, folks. The Vikings just don't get it. In the words of Sid Hartman, the Vikings could screw up a two-car funeral. There are a lot of reasons franchises struggle to sell tickets and fail to ingratiate themselves with the public. Winning and losing has a lot to do with that, but little things like "treatment of people" tend to add up over time. Some franchises tend to cut a lot of slack to the "head-cases" that get in trouble with the law off the field, and then fine those players who leave to attend funerals. Hell, even THE CHECK has paid bereavement time.

Once again, the Vikes should pick up the phone and ask the Wild for some advice before making decisions.

Peace,

Jeff

296 Yards !?!

A few thoughts on the day in football (and one hockey note):

1. I have to admit that I am amazed at the Vikings performance today. Beforehand, this game had all the markings of a good, sound San Diego thrashing of the Vikes. But they beat the Chargers 35-17, for God sakes. It's almost like the Metrodome crossed into a parallel universe this afternoon. The Vikes had a great pass rush, and held LaDainian Tomlinson to 40 yards rushing.

The most amazing performance, however, was that of Adrian Peterson. All he did today was set an all-time NFL single-game rushing record with 296 yards on 30 carries. That's two games this year in which Peterson has rushed for more than 200 yards. The dude can play. As I have said before, there is now a reason to watch Viking games.

2. OK, Dools. Maybe Detroit is better than I thought.

3. The Packers Super (natural) Bowl drive continues. They are now 7 and 1 after coming from behind and beating Kansas City. It's happening, folks, and no amount of logic can stop it.

4. Lastly, Jase and I attended the Wild game last night against the hated Calgary Flames. The Wild won 4 - 1, and are now 6-0 in games in which Jase attends. I will be calling the Wild offices tomorrow to see if they will provide season tickets to Jase.

Peace,

Jeff

Still More News Items and Amazing Factoids

Here are some things that are on my mind today:

1. It's going to be hard for me to type this because tonight is the Timberwolves season opener and I am breathing into a bag in anticipation.

2. Sasquatch sighting in Pennsylvania. Many of you have e-mailed me about the recent Sasquatch sighting in Pennsylvania. The BFRO web site was reporting this sighting a couple of weeks ago, but the mainstream media continues to bury it's head in the sand and did not mention it until a few days ago. They probably didn't want to cause a panic. An R. Jacobs took the following photo with a Bushnell camera with an infrared (invisible) flash. Some people think it's a "mangy" bear. They always say it's a bear. The BFRO web site has some good information on the differnce between an "ape-like" body and a bear. Whatever helps you sleep at night.

3. NBC Football Goes "Green." Check this one out. In an effort to "go green," NBC's Sunday night studio show will deliberately go dark for the last minute of the show — before fully lit coverage of Dallas-Philadelphia kicks off at about 7:15 p.m. CT — and stay dark during the halftime and postgame studio shows. All in an effort to save energy for the environment. There's more. Here is what Producer Michael Weisman had to say about the idea:

"We're opening ourselves up for ridicule and sarcasm," Weisman says. "It might be perceived as a stunt. But with 20 million people watching, some might say, 'Let's go turn out the lights in rooms we're not using."

Ridicule and sarcasm? No way, Mike! Here's more:

Weisman says, FNA will show satellite shots of U.S. cities "to show all that electricity being used," turn its onscreen logos green and include Bob Costas talking to Matt Lauer, who'll be near the north pole to report for NBC's Today show next week.

So let me get this straight. There will a few minutes of "dark" in an effort to remind all of the good people to "go turn off all of the lights in the other rooms." I already do this - constantly. Then, there will be satellite shots of U.S. cities "to show all that electricity being used (by you ass-holes)." Folks, I don't know if Global Warming is real or not, but this is the kind of thing that gives the people who believe it IS real a bad name. You know how these frauds could save a lot of money on electricity? Play the game during THE DAY. But, then The Ratings might not be as good, right? It's all about ratings.

4. Saudi Marriage 'Expert' Advises Men in 'Right Way' to Beat Their Wives. You read that correctly. Those of you who know me realize that I am always looking for advice on life's matters. Well, Saudi author and cleric, "Dr." Muhammad Al-'Arifi, who in a segment broadcast on Saudi and Kuwaiti television in September, counseled young Muslim men on how to treat their wives. As you know, the Saudi's are making a broad attempt to move their culture into the 14th century, so I wanted to know what Al-Arifi had to say. Here are some words of wisdom from the interview. This is real, folks:

"Admonish them – once, twice, three times, four times, ten times," he advised. "If this doesn't help, refuse to share their beds."

And if that doesn't work?

"Beat them," one of his three young advisees responded. "That's right," Al-'Arifi said.

OK, but what is the "right way" to go about this?

"Beating in the face is forbidden, even when it comes to animals," he explained. "Even if you want your camel or donkey to start walking, you are not allowed to beat it in the face. If this is true for animals, it is all the more true when it comes to humans. So beatings should be light and not in the face."

Right! I beat my donkeys and camels on the behind when I want them to start walking. Al-Arifi's final words of wisdom ? Here are some "words" that can be utilized to get a man's point across:

"Woman, it has gone too far! I can't bear it anymore," he tells the men to tell their wives. "If he beats her, the beatings must be light and must not make her face ugly.
"He must beat her where it will not leave marks. He should not beat her on the hand... He should beat her in some places where it will not cause any damage. He should not beat her like he would beat an animal or a child -- slapping them right and left.

Wow, Dr. Phil. That's really insightful. Do not beat them as you would "a child." And "do not make her ugly." Al-Arifi is thinking about all angles, here. I hope you are all taking notes.

You just can't make this crap up. This type of "thinking" is what we are up against, people. Scary.

Peace.

Jeff