Home Alone

So, my wife and kids are at Linder's buying some Christmas ornaments and, for the first time in quite some time, I am home alone after work. Should I relax by brewing some coffee and putting on some Christmas music? Should I read the paper? Should I have a bowl of ice cream and put whatever I please on top of it? No, I think I will relax by putting some plastic on the windows.

Now, a few days ago I went out and bought the good stuff - 3M. I am not messing around with Roundy's window insulation. There are 8 easy steps listed on the back of the 3M box to complete the task. I like, too, when they estimate on the box how long it should take a person to complete the task. "Should Be Completed in 15 Minutes!" By who, Bob Villa? It should say "Handy, normal people should complete in 15 minutes. If your name is Jeff Thompson, allow the better part of the afternoon."

Anyway, I picked one window next to the computer so it would be warmer when I work on my blog. Screw the kids room. I applied the fancy tape around the border - the kind that is sticky on both sides. (And what genius thought that up? I bet he didn't spend six nights a week on Water Street). Next, I unfolded the plastic and "applied firmly to tape" like the box says. So far, so good. Only a few ripples and waves in the middle. Anyway, those "excess wrinkles" as the box states, will be taken care of when I blow dry the plastic - which is the last step. What Marketing Executive did they pay to come up with "wrinkles?" I like "waves." I found the hair dryer, which has not been used on my hair since the 80's, and finished the job. Except, the wrinkles did not go away. If fact, the plastic appears to have loosed up and created hills. In fact, if you look at the plastic in the right light, I swear you can make out words. I think it says, "shitty job Jeff."

But, who cares. I can already tell that the cold air is being kept out better than before. I have never been accused of being a perfectionist, so what the hell. Time to watch the Wild play the hated Chicago Goonhawks with the dudes.

I just hope the forecast calling for a return to the 40's is correct so no cold air comes through that window.