My wife ordered the Wii Fit game a couple of weeks ago. My family has been waiting anxiously for the game to arrive. Well, I was at the park playing baseball with The Dudes yesterday when I saw the big brown UPS truck drive by and turn towards our house. Sure enough, Wii fit was delivered to our doorstep. What is Wii Fit, you ask? Here is the description from their Web site:
Wii Fit is a combination of fitness and fun, designed for everyone, young and old. By playing Wii Fit a little every day, you, your friends, and your family can work towards personal goals of better health and fitness.
That's the nice thing about the Wii video game system, you know. A person can actually work up a sweat and burn a few calories while playing games instead of just sitting on the couch, starting to look like Jabba the Hut. Before a person can get started on the Wii fit game, however, they need to take a "fitness assessment." You must enter your height and age and stand on a scale that is included with the game. The scale not only calculates your weight, but it assesses your posture. And here is the best part: the "game" assesses if you are "normal, overweight or OBESE" based on this data. Lastly, a workout regimen is prescribed BY THE GAME.
OK. First of all, this whole process gives me "going to the doctor" vibes. As we all know, I hate going to the doctor. The doctor never says "you should gain some weight by drinking more beer." The doctor pokes and prods and scowls and asks how much booze and coffee you drink. Then, the doctor says "quit that." I don't need some game on the TV in my living room telling me the same thing.
Anyway, my entire family took their "fitness assessment" and were found to be "normal." Maybe not the best posture, but "normal" weight. The time came for Dad to take his fitness assessment. My heart started to race like it does when I walk into the dreaded doctor's office. I got on the scale and entered my height (5' 11") and age (41). Some weasily voice on the game announced that the weight calculation had started. After a few seconds (which seemed like an hour) the verdict was in:
Overweight. 190 lbs.
Now, this does not come as the ultimate shock of all-time. I just got back from a trip to Scotland, for God sakes. Fish and Chips. Beer. Steak and Ale Pies. Beer. And, hey, some of that 190 lbs. has to be sheer muscle, right? You have seen The Guns. Right? I admit that my pants have seemed a little tighter lately, but I thought it was just the new detergent we are using.
Overweight.
And, on top of that, do you know what the "desired weight" for a 41-year old, 5'11" male? Around 170 lbs. 170!! If I lost 20 lbs. I would be a little wisp of a thing that would blow away in a good wind. Screw you Wii fit - 170 lbs. That's ridiculous. Do you know where "overweight" starts for a 41-year-old 5'11" guy? 179 lbs.! Are you kidding me? That means, at 190 lbs., I am not just a little overweight, I'm half-way to OBESE! Seriously - screw you Wii Fit! I don't need this.
My Madden 2008 and MLB Wii games do not give me this kind of guff. Wii Fit is like having a little doctor in my television screen. Watching. Looking. Judging. I was going to have a nice big breakfast, but instead I had some fiber-ridden cereal and a bagel.
Screw you, Wii Fit.
Jeff
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7 comments:
I think the Wii needs two tickets to the gun show:
http://www.gofish.com/player.gfp?gfid=30-1016595
You must have had the Fit set to Euro-mode. No way a red blooded American male nearly 6 feet tall should be 170 pounds.
Good luck, however I prefer to exercise on my stationary bike watching Battlestar Galactica on a DVD player.
I got Wii Fit and have used it every day since last Wednesday. I too was about 5'11 and 190. I am also willing to admit that I am sort of fat.
I wake up every morning feeling somehow accountable to my Wii Fit. I think that is actually a good thing. I am eating better and getting on the thing 30 minutes a day.
So far I have lost 5 pounds and my legs are toned to Greek God status.
Screw you Wii Fit hater!!
Your cholesterol medication can't help you now. Fatty-fat, fat, fat!
That thing would probably dial 911 if I stepped on it.
CR
I have to admit that, just like Dave M., I feel accountable to the Wii Fit. One day I didn't use it. The next day, it said "Too busy to excercise yesterday, Jeff?"
Pretty soon, it's going to start saying "pizza for lunch again, Jeff?" Or "do you really need another beer, Jeff?"
Frightening.
And by the way - fatty-fat, fat, fat?
Hi Roger.
Jeff
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