More Important Stuff

Here's the stuff keeping me up at night lately:

1. So Kevin Garnett gets his ring. Free wrote a good post about this. I must say that Free is a better man than me because I am rather bitter about the whole thing, which probably says more about me than anything. Nothing against Kevin Garnett, mind you. He poured his heart and soul into playing for the Cursed Timberwolves for over a decade. He put Minnesota back on the NBA map. But anybody who has been paying attention knew in their heart that, the minute the trade was made, Boston would win the championship this year. Seeing Garnett win a championship in Boston is a little like having an ex-wife who marries a Hollywood star and hits the lottery. "Oh yeah. I'm.............really happy for her." This is How Things Happen in Minnesota.

This is why we all know there is only one way for another Minnesota team, the Vikings, to win the Super Bowl: move. If the Vikings move to LA, Vegas, Toronto or Fargo, they win the Super Bowl within two years - no question. This is How Things Happen in Minnesota. Staying with that same topic, Dr. Z of SI.com is picking the Vikings to WIN THE SUPER BOWL this year. Ah, Dr. Z? Have you been watching the Vikings over the last 40 years? It simply can't happen.

And by the way, does anybody read Bill Simmons on espn.com? Simmons is the Boston shill for ESPN. I like the guy, and he is very funny, but his "Boy Am I On Cloud 9 Now That the (insert Patriots, Red Sox or Celtics) have won the (insert Super Bowl, World Series or NBA Championship) is getting old. My God, Boston should just keep a permanent street route open for championship victory parades. This is akin to the same guy winning the lottery over and over and over and saying "Boy am I psyched that I won a zillion dollars for the 12th time! I haven't felt this good in hours!" We're happy for you Bill. Again.

2. I was perusing the movie reviews in the paper the other day and noticed that one particular film was rated PG-13 for violence, profanity and........smoking. Smoking? I had to read that three times. I don't remember smoking playing into movie ratings before. Sure enough, I Googled "smoking and movies" and found a May 11th New York Times article on the subject. Here is what that article had to say:

In a significant change to its movie ratings system, the Motion Picture Association of America on Thursday said portrayals of smoking would be considered alongside sex and violence in assessing the suitability of movies for young viewers. Films that appear to glamorize smoking will risk a more restrictive rating, and descriptions of tobacco use will be added to the increasingly detailed advisories that accompany each rated film.

Antismoking groups, already successful in much of the country in banning smoking in bars, restaurants and other public places, have ratcheted up the pressure on Hollywood in recent years to purge movies of images that might promote tobacco use. Some have even demanded that virtually any film with smoking be rated R, shutting out those under 17 unless they are accompanied by a parent or adult guardian.

Now, I am not a smoker. But, come on people. Smoking is going to put on the same level with people having sex, heads getting cut off and the "old-F'n-heimer" being uttered every 15 seconds in movies? Come on. What is next in movie ratings? How about these things: Drinking beer. Hamburger eating. Not wearing seat belts. The movie listings in the paper will be as thick as the telephone book. Would anybody NOT take their kids to a movie if there is smoking? Here's some more from the NY Times article:

Dr. Healton said her group advocated an R rating for all smoking references unless they were historically accurate or “unambiguously demonstrate the health issues.” Lindsay Doran, a veteran Hollywood producer known within the film community for her opposition to onscreen smoking, applauded the ratings revision.

“It would be nice if we could leave this to the filmmakers,” said Ms. Doran, producer of last year’s PG-13 rated “Stranger Than Fiction,” in which Emma Thompson played something of a human ashtray, and quite deliberately deglamorized her tobacco addiction. But, Ms. Doran added, even socially conscious Hollywood types could use a nudge.

“This makes people say, ‘Wait a minute, what are we doing here, and why are we doing it?’ ” she said.

So if it's an ugly loser smoking, the movie's PG. If it's a beautiful heroine smoking, it gets an R. Look, I realize that smoking is bad for a person. It just seems to me that we are trying to "classify, rate, warn, etc." against every possible type of "bad behavior" because it is assumed people cannot think for themselves.

3. Lastly, my favorite politician to "needle," Minneapolis Mayor R.T. Rybak, is at it again. Now that the controversial circus animal issue has been solved, Mayor Rybak has found a new windmill to attack - bottled water. From today's StarTribune.com:

Minneapolis Mayor R.T. Rybak and other mayors from around the country are urging all U.S. cities to stop spending tax money on bottled water, and instead drink from the tap. A resolution to that effect has been written and will be presented Saturday in the Environment Committee of the U.S. Conference of Mayors meeting in Miami.

The resolution, submitted by Rybak and the mayors of 14 other cities, cites a host of reasons why cities should use their own municipal water, rather than bottled water.

Rybak's office stopped serving bottled water last year, and Minneapolis has about $200,000 in its budget this year to promote city water.

Also, the city of Minneapolis points out that a resident can refill a bottle 2,850 times with city water before equaling the price of a single 79-cent bottle of store-bought water.

Coca-Cola (Dasani), Nestle (Ice Mountain) and PepsiCo (Aquafina) are the leaders in a $10.8 billion-a-year bottled water industry in the United States, with demand growing 8 percent a year.

Going up against a $10.8 billion-a-year industry? Good luck with that fight, Mayor. I am just glad that the issues of crime, retail/office vacancy, downtown job loss, etc. have been solved in Minneapolis. This leaves plenty of time for circus animals and bottled water. Look, Rybak seems to be a nice guy, and he was always very cordial when I wrote him e-mails about his "lack of involvement" on the Twins stadium (you think I didn't?). His was always very kind to respond. He never really answered my questions for him, which amounted to "what the hell are you really doing?" There was a lot of talking in circles. I guess we'll see where this hard-hitting issue ends up.

4. Lastly, I am keeping an eye on the NHL draft tonight on the internet. The Wild pick 24th. I have noticed something new - individuals born in the 1990's are now routinely being drafted into the National Hockey League.

These are the things that keep me up at night.

Jeff