He Invented the Question Mark....

Dr. Evil talks about his father in group therapy.

Simply one of the best movie monologues of all-time.

He accused chestnuts of being lazy...

Jeff

Bad For Baseball

Seven years, one-hundred-and-sixty-one million dollar$. That is the contract that C.C Sabathia signed with (you guessed it) the New York Yankees today. Rumor has it that the Yankees are also prepared to offer pitcher A.J. Burnett a five-year deal in the range of $90 million dollars. Add this to the fact that last year, the Yankees had a payroll of $209 million dollars. It appears as if that total will increase significantly in 2009. Oddly enough, the Yanks finished 89-73 (1 game better than the $57-million payroll Twins) and 8 games out of first place, proving that money doesn't necessarily buy championships and that karma is real.

It appears that the news of the economic downtown has not reached the offices of the New York Yankees.

Now, I can't blame Sabathia for taking the Yankees offer. After all, it was $60 million more than the next best offer of $100 million from his former team, the Milwaukee Brewers. Part of me wishes, however, that a guy like Sabathia would say "Hey, I really enjoyed Milwaukee and we made the playoffs with a very good young team. I think I'll take the $100 mil and stay where I'm loved." This, to me, is like looking at a plate of a dozen doughnuts and saying, "I think I'll eat just 8 doughnuts instead of all 12." You're going to be full either way, and probably won't get sick.

I realize this is a pipe dream, folks. It will never happen. Sure, back in THE DAY, Kirby Puckett and Kent Hrbek took less to stay with the Twins, where they won World Championships and were considered local heroes. That was back when the contract they accepted was worth $6 mil rather than $7 mil that New York or Boston offered. Chump change, right? That was back in the the day in which the rest of baseball wasn't necessarily a minor league for a handful of East and West coast teams. Or the Cubs, which is irrelevant because they are cursed.

Folks, this contract is bad for baseball. I'm not saying the Yankees are guaranteed to win the next 10 World Series Championships, because that is not the issue. There are teams that draft better talent and play the game better than the Yankees. The issue is that this contract sets the "new bar" for elite free agents. And The Bar just keeps on rising. I thought Armageddon was upon us when Johan Santana was offered $130 mil for 6 years by the New York Mets. Well, one year later, that contract is eclipsed by $30 million. When is this going to stop?

Baseball is the last professional sport with absolutely no salary cap. Football, hockey and basketball have figured out that a salary cap, while not perfect, is good for their respective sports. Baseball has not been successful in implementing a cap, however, largely because the players union is second in power to only God Himself. The players union is not going to settle for a salary cap as long as teams are willing to offer players contracts like the Yankees offered C.C Sabathia today.

I believe these types of contracts will lead to another work stoppage, probably a lockout by the owners, until the situation can be remedied. Just like what happened in hockey. I understand that baseball is in much better financial shape than hockey, but I don't know if that will be true in 5 years. Particularly if the economy does not turn around. This is why teams like the Yankees are ultimately hurting baseball. You see, baseball is not a true "free market" competition. While the Yankees are trying to eliminate their competition ON the field, they actually NEED their competition OFF of the field. The Yankees NEED the Twins, Tigers, Indians, Rays, etc., just as they need the Red Sox. That is, unless baseball wants a 6-team league. In addition, a team like the Twins cannot decide to compete in the Yankees lucrative market, like other business can. They can't say, "Hey, we want a piece of that New York media pie and it's 19-million population." It's simply not "true" free market competition.

That is why I truly believe baseball needs to get with the other 3 major leagues and implement a salary cap. Otherwise, the sport is headed for big trouble.

Jeff

Wittman Fired;McHale in as Coach (Round II)

Things aren't going so well for the Timberwolves this year. Kevin McHale now takes over as coach to try and right the ship with the team he assembled.

Good luck.

Escape From Detroit

Well, that was terrifying. Vikes win, 20-16. I really thought they were going to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory and lose to the 0-12 Lions today. The Lions played inspired ball, considering they had nothing to play for.

For those of you who might not be reading this post from the Minnesota/Wisconsin area, I realize that I, and most Viking fans, sound like paranoid cynics. That is because we are all paranoid cynics. And with good reason - the Vikings have blown more big games, often against horrible foes, than most NFL teams. There have been books written on this subject. I called tony8489 during the game and he made a good point, however. Maybe the Lions bad luck trumps the Vikings bad luck. That is probably true.

If I were to give out game balls today, one goes to Jared Allen, who nearly had his knees taken out by a Detroit rookie offensive lineman. I'm don't believe the guy was trying to injure Allen, but you can't take out a player's knees like that. Allen went out for a series and then came back and played hurt with a vengeance. This guy is a throwback to the 60's/70's mentality of "you play unless you are hospitalized." It nice to see is this era of sports (see M. Gaborik).

The other game ball would go to the forgotten QB - one Tarvaris Jackson. Jackson was sitting on the sidelines listening to his iPod and eating Cheetos when Gus Frerotte went down with an injury. Although his hasn't played since week 2, he came in and calmly guided the Vikings on 2 touchdown drives. He was 8 of 10 for 105 yards and a TD. He just might have resurrected his career with that performance.

The Vikes should win the division with one more victory. Here's hoping T-Jack has some more life in his arm, and that U.S. District Judge Paul Magnuson delays any more legal decisions for a few more months.

By the way - do you know who the Detroit Lion in that picture up top is? That is ex-Viking safety Dwight ("I'm just sitting in my car smoking pot, officer") Smith. He's probably high as a kite in that picture.

Peace,

Jeff

A Few Observations

Here are a couple of thoughts on a cold Saturday night.....

1. Jase and I attended the Wild game last night against the hated Vancouver Canucks. Vancouver won 2-1, took over first place from the Wild and, to make matters worse, Jase and I were in the beer line when the Wild scored their lone goal. The game was still a lot of fun, however, as they always are. I couldn't help but think throughout the game that the Wild could benefit from the services of one Mary Ann Gaborik, but he is still out (of course) with a "lower body injury" sustained while playing hackey sack (100% truth).

I don't want to talk about Gaborik, however. I want to talk about an odd trend that continued last night. The trend is that no matter what game I attend - Wild, Twins, Vikings, Wolves (hypothetically), or Gophers - I am guaranteed to sit right next to fans of the opposing team. This happens without fail. And, sure enough, Jase and I sat right next to 4 Canucks fans visiting town from Winnipeg, Manitoba. Now, I know what you are thinking. You are thinking that, to be fans of an evil team like Vancouver, these guys must have been real pricks, bordering on Satanists. That is what I thought, too. I have found that most fans of the opposing team are ass-holes, particularly Chicago Bear fans. Well, too my surprise, these guys turned out to be 4 of the nicest guys you could ever meet. It turns out they adopted Vancouver as their team after the Winnipeg Jets left for the hockey hotbed of Phoenix a few years back.

We actually hung out with these guys at the Liffy after the game and they bought us a beer. They were very complimentary towards the Wild, their fans, and the Xcel Energy Center. One of them used to cheer for the North Stars, for God's sake. I guess it just goes to show you that if Wild fans and Vancouver fans can get along, there might just be hope for this world after all.

By the way, if the NHL wants to get serious, the league must admit that it is a regional, northern sport and put teams back in Winnipeg, Quebec and Hamilton. To accomplish this, they should move Nashville, Florida and Atlanta's teams to those Canadian cities. Hockey in those southern cities is a joke.

2. Tonight at Target Center, the 4-14 Timberwolves take on the 3-16 Los Angeles Clippers. Do you think there are still tickets available?

3. Lastly, I see that Pat and Kevin Williams have been given a reprieve by a federal judge in St. Paul and will be allowed to play against the Lions this Sunday. There is also speculation that they will be able to play the rest of this year. Now, I have asked myself how I would feel about this whole thing if these were not Viking players. On one side, I blame the Williams boys for taking any type of supplement that was not clearly approved by the league. That is a huge risk to themselves and their team's fortunes. On the other side, it sounds like they took steps through their physicians and by calling league offices to try and surmise if the supplement was acceptable and they did not receive an answer from either source. If the NFL is going to start suspending players with no pay for 4 games, they had better develop a list that is clear - beyond a doubt - of what supplements are acceptable and not acceptable. If you want to read a good article on the subject by Patrick Ruesse, certainly no Viking apologist, here it is.

So, Pat and Kevin will be allowed to play against Detroit on Sunday. This is a game the Vikings should win by 21 points. Anyone who has followed the Viking franchise knows, however, that this is the type of game that they blow. On the road against a divisional opponent, a week of distractions with the legal case, ex-Viking QB starting for the other team. I must say that I am getting bad vibes.

I will say this - if the Vikings cannot beat the 0-12 Detroit Lions on Sunday, they have no business claiming they should be NFC North division champs and they have no business making the playoffs.

That is all for now.

Jeff

Only the Vikings.

There is only one team in professional sports that could do this.

Only the Minnesota Vikings could go 7-3 after a 0-2 start, take over 1st place in their division, and then have 2 of their best players suspended for using a banned diuretic.

Only the Minnesota Vikings could handily defeat their bitter rivals on national television, take over sole possession of 1st place, and then have 2 of their best players suspended for using a banned diuretic.

Only the Minnesota Vikings, on the SAME DAY their owner declared "...glad to see things are falling into place the way we envisioned it" and their last victory "...was really a turning point for our franchise," could have 2 of their best players suspended for using a banned diuretic.

They will let you down every time, these Minnesota Vikings. This is why I waited before writing a beaming review of their well-played victory over the Bears. The proverbial, unavoidable "OTHER SHOE" had not yet dropped.

Well, it dropped today.

You heard it here first:

Detroit - 26
Vikings - 20.

Peace.

Jeff

The Blog.....Two Year Anniversary (!?)

I was going to talk about the Viking victory over the hated Bears until I realized that today, December 1st, 2008, is the two-year anniversary of What Jeff Thinks. Yes, it is true. I will post some thoughts about the game later this week, once it has been determined if Kevin and Pat Williams have been suspended by the NFL.

December 1, 2006 to December 1, 2008. Two years of Sasquatch speculation, incorrect sports prognostications, visions, talking politics out of both sides of my mouth, rumors, innuendo, stadium talk etc. I have to admit that I wasn't sure if the blog would last this long. I also have to admit that I have been getting a little lazy with my writing recently. My nights are filled with the kid's homework and other tasks these days and I am usually asleep by 9:30 so I am fresh for THE CHECK each morning. There is just not as much time to put all of my thoughts in writing.

Now, if some of you are starting to get worried (or excited) that I am thinking of shutting this blog down - don't worry. I have to keep this thing going for sanity reasons. After all, I have to complain about the Vikings/Gophers/Twins/Wolves/Wild/Packers/Bears/White Sox/Yankees/Red Sox/Canucks/Avs/Flames (and so on) to somebody. This thing serves a mental health purpose for me.

I also really enjoy reader comments. When I write a post at night, I look forward to waking up in the morning to see what comments might have been added. I have to admit I am a little bummed when there is none. I'd also like to thank the regular readers - tony8489, CR, Tito, The Pantless Wonder, Neil K., snyde043, Free, Dave M., KSue., Jase, Gilby, dools, Phil, Paul F., Jerry, Roger, Uncle Rob, Pete, Shane.......etc. Sorry if I forgot anyone! Thanks for taking the time to check the blog out.

I also would like to thank all of the "Anonymous" commenter's out there who take the time to leave a message. If you don't want to add your name, that's cool.

Lastly, in honor of the two-year anniversary of What Jeff Thinks, I told my daughter that she could pick out any picture and I would add it to this post. She thought about it, and here is what she decided: So there you go. Two years and counting...

Jeff