This Team Needs Some Mustaches

There is a tradition in the NHL in which players begin growing beards as the playoffs begin, and they do not shave until their team is eliminated. This usually means that the two teams left by the time the Stanley Cup rolls around look like lumberjacks.

Well, Twins pitcher Carl Pavano has started a new tradition - the mustache. It wasn't too long ago that a good portion of professional athletes actually sported mustaches because they were "in." Well, they are really not "in" anymore. In fact, you are more likely to see neck tattoos than mustaches these days. But not for Carl Pavano. Since growing the mustache, Pavano has only allowed 1 earned run in this last 18 innings and has 2 complete-game shutout victories. He has looked unhittable. He has improved to 9-6 on the season with a 3.33 ERA. During this time, the rest of the Twins starting pitchers have been getting hammered like they are tossing batting practice. The Solution?

Time to start growing the mustaches. Not just the pitchers - the whole team. And that includes you Joe Mauer.

Until the Twins can figure out how to add some new blood to this pitching staff (i.e Cliff Lee), they need to do something drastic. This crappy pitching and lack of clutch hitting cannot continue.

Mustaches would give the Twins the type of competitive edge that they have been missing over the past few weeks. Mustaches would set the players apart from the rest of the clean-shaven jerks or those were mere beards or passe goatees. Mustaches would provide much-needed Mojo to a team that appears lifeless.

The time has come. Until a trade can be made to add a top-line pitcher, this has become a necessity.

The Day of the Mustache is upon us.

Jeff

The Gaslight Anthem - Some Needed Summer Music

Admittedly, much of the music I have been listening to lately has been kind of a downer. While I love The National, they do not exactly inspire a person to run a marathon. Once again, it's the difference between "winter music" and "summer music." The fact that we're now officially reached summer means it's time to experience some more upbeat music. The new releases from The Hold Steady and the surprisingly "twangy, 1970's country-vibe" Band of Horses album have been on heavy rotation on my iPod.

Another band that fits description is The Gaslight Anthem. These New Jersey rockers are influenced heavily by their admitted hero Bruce Springsteen. They have also been compared to The Hold Steady (who they often appear with in concert), Tim-era Replacements (that is all I needed to hear), Social Distortion and The Clash. I disagree with The Clash comparisons because, while The Clash was pure British, Gaslight Anthem is 100% American rock 'n' roll. And, unlike The Clash, Gaslight Anthem is not out to save the world. Politics and world affairs are not the subject of their songs. This does not mean their lyrics are not intelligent, however. Much like early Springsteen, these songs are about life circumstances, the choices we make, growing up and getting older and, yes, even eventually facing death. An example is from their son "The '59 Sound:"

Well, I wonder which song they're gonna play when we go.
I hope it's something quiet and minor and peaceful and slow.
When we float out into the ether, into the Everlasting Arms,
I hope we don't hear Marley's chains we forged in life.
'Cause the chains I been hearing now for most of my life.

Did you hear the '59 Sound coming through on Grandmama's radio?
Did you hear the rattling chains in the hospital walls?
Did you hear the old gospel choir when they came to carry you over?
Did you hear your favorite song one last time?

I believe this song is written about a friend who died in a sudden car accident, and the singer wondering about the end to his own life. But it's not presented in a way that makes the listener want to jump off a cliff. It's upbeat and oddly uplifting. Much of today's music is moody and somewhat experimental, which is not necessarily a bad thing. I have to admit, however, that my soul needs some tunes that brings me back to the days of hanging out with with buddies and drinking beer at Carson Park. I need some uplifting summer music. The Gaslight Anthem is just that kind of music.

Jeff

What The Hell Just Happened? Please Get Cliff Lee.

Ok, let me get this straight. The Twins started a 9-game road trip by winning 2 out of 3 games IN Philadelphia. They won a game that Cole Hamels started in which they were trailing by 5 runs in the 9th inning, and then soundly beat Roy Halladay the next day. Good start to the road trip. Then, the Twins proceed to travel to Milwaukee and play against the Brewers, a team that is 10 games under .500 and a team that the Twins have beaten in 5 straight series.

And they get swept.

What the hell is going on? (Side note to Jase: No offense to the Brewers. They played a good series, and I believe are better than their record). By the way, after watching a fair portion of the three games played, I think that Ricky Weeks might be the best player in baseball. While the Twins remain in 1st place, the lead is shrinking. While Detroit continues to match the Twins "up and down" play, Chicago has won 9 games in a row and is now within 2 1/2 games of the Twins.

I realize the MLB season is a "marathon, not a sprint." Teams are going to have slumps. It is not time to freak out. But, I have to admit that I am a little concerned about the Twins starting pitching. They simply do not have a starter that can be trusted to stop a losing streak. They do not have a Viola, Blyleven, Santana or even a Radke. In one of my last posts, I advocated three things to improve their team (because the Twins brass, no doubt, reads this blog awaiting instruction):

1. Cut ties with Jesse Crain. Has not happened yet.
2. Bring in Jose Morales as the back up catcher. Has not happened yet.
3. Relieve Brenden Harris of his duties. TCO'd - sent to AAA.

I have to add a 4th bullet point. The Twins need to add another starting pitcher. As soon as possible. They need to add a "stopper." Somebody who is going to stop losing streaks as Viola and Santana used to do. As has been reported in the media, Seattle pitcher Cliff Lee is the best possible scenario. He is available if the Twins are willing to part ways with some prospects, most likely catcher Wilson Ramos and one of their outfield prospects. The time has come to get this done.

The Twins always had the lack of revenue at the Metrodome as an excuse in the past when they did not make big mid-season trades for high salaried players. They no longer have that excuse. Target Field is sold out, and the Twins will draw 3 million fans for the first time since 1988. Along with 3 million fans comes added revenue. They need to show these 3 million fans that they are serious about contending for a World Series championship in 2010, and trade for Cliff Lee. After all, who would you rather have starting a series against the New York Yankees in the playoffs - Lee or Scott Baker?

The word is that Cliff Lee can be a bit of a jerk in the club house. While there is no question that this is generally a "red flag," I would actually welcome a hot-head on this team. The Twins, a team full of boy scounts, may need a jack-ass right now to stir things up. There is no question that Lee will leave for another team at the end of the year, but the Twins could utilize him like the Brewers did with C.C. Sabathia - pitch him until his arm falls off (preferable after the season).

Make the trade. Show the fans that you're serious about the post season.

Jeff

More Indisputable Evidence of the Sasquatch

If you don't believe in the Sasquatch after hearing this tale, you never will.

Jeff

Over Before It Began

I was in attendance with my kids at yesterday's Twins game at Target Field. It was the rubber game of a three-game series against hated Atlanta. The prior two games were well-pitched contests that were both decided by 1 run in the late innings. Almost playoff-like. It's unfortunate that the Twins brass decided to literally give up before Sunday's game when they put this lineup on the field:

1. Nick Punto (.221)
2. Trevor Plouffe (.130)
3. Joe Mauer (DH)
4. Joe Morneau
5. Micheal Cuddyer
6. Jason Kubel
7. Delmon Young
8. Brendan Harris (.160)
9. Drew (Sal) Butera (.135)

The Twins were down 4-0 after 1/2 an inning, and simply had no chance while fielding this lineup. I have to admit that I was more on the edge of my seat during the mascot game than I was in the actual tilt against the Braves. Now, I realize that the Twins have a bunch of injuries. Orlando Hudson and J.J. Hardy on are the DL. But Nick Punto leading off and Trevor Plouffe batting second? If they only would have put Matt Tolbert in at First Base for Justin Morneau, the Twins would have had a lineup that would have had trouble competing against the St. Paul Saints. And poor Brendan Harris. He looks so overmatched at the plate right now, a guy has to wonder if he has amnesia or something. Thank the Lord for Delmon Young (I bet you never thought you'd hear my say that). Without him in the lineup recently, the Twins might be getting shut out on a regular basis. When I saw this lineup on the jumbotron before the game, I literally thought it was some kind of joke. And, I am not alone in my thinking.

I normally don't get into second-guessing Ron Gardenhire or anything, but I can only surmise that this was some kind of protest lineup by the Manager. Perhaps he's trying to make a point about the lack of help provided to him by Management or from the Minors? I don't know. I can't come up with anything.

It's not time to freak out or anything. The Twins are sitting at 36-27 and in first place in the AL Central. There are a few things, however, that I think they have to admit if they want to stay in that position the rest of the year:

1. Brendan Harris should not be in the lineup. The common perception seems to be that Harris simply needs more playing time to for his hitting to improve. Not if the Twins have any interest in making the playoffs, he doesn't.

2. It's time to cut the cord with Jesse Crain. Look, he's a nice guy and I don't question his desire. But, his 5.26 ERA is killing the team once again. And, his ERA with runners in scoring position and two outs? 23.50.

3. Drew Butera is a solid defensive catcher. He is simply overmatched batting, however, at the Major League level (as Bert Blyleven would say). He is an automatic out. It may be time to think of calling up Jose Morales or Wilson Ramos as the back up catcher.

Obviously, it will benefit the Twins to get Hudson and Hardy back in the lineup. But in the meantime, they may want to consider a few of those mascots I saw play yesterday. TC Bear and Nordy from the Wild were pretty darn good.

Jeff

The World's Most Popular Sport

Here are the scores so far in the 2010 World Cup:

South Africa - 1

Mexico - 1

and....

Uruguay - 0

France - 0

I cannot contain my enthusiasm!

Blackhawks Win Stanley Cup

The Chicago Blackhawks have won the 2010 Stanley Cup. They are the NHL Champions. This, admittedly, is still a bit hard for me to swallow. Now, it's much better than if this would have happened at any time during the 1980's and early 1990's. You see, I hated the Chicago Blackhawks more than any organized entity on God's Green Earth back then (yes, even more than the Yankees). That was back in the days in which the North Stars played North of the Mason-Dixon line on the Bloomington prairie. The Blackhawks were their single-biggest rival, hands down, in the Norris Division.

Well, the North Stars moved to the hockey hotbed of Texas in 1993 and Minnesota did not return to the NHL until the year 2000 with the advent of the Wild. Even then, the NHL brainwizards put the Wild in something called the Northwest Division. The Minnesota Wild were now matched up against Vancouver, Calgary, Colorado and Edmonton instead of Chicago, Detroit and St. Louis. This travesty, however, is a topic for another post.

Suddenly, the Chicago Blackhawks were no longer division rivals for the Minnesota NHL team. They most likely play twice a year, hardly enough to foster any real type of hatred. They say time heals all wounds. The mere sight of the Blackhawks jersey used to make me watch to wretch. Now, I have almost no negative reaction. It certainly does not bring any type of "glee" to me, but my reaction is very neutral.

Hey - at least the Stanley Cup was won by an "Original 6" member of the NHL. I am sick of the Tampa's and Carolina's of the world winning The Cup. Their "fans" don't even know they have a team in their city until the second round of the playoffs. But this travesty is a topic for another post.

It took the Chicago Blackhawks a decade of absolute futility to obtain the top draft picks to build this championship team. They took Patrick Kane with the overall 1st pick in the 2007 draft and Jonathon Toews with the 2006 3rd overall pick. You have to be pretty bad to draft this high. But then again, you also have to draft well (see: Timberwolves). Chicago made the right moves.

The Blackhawks winning the Stanley Cup got me thinking about the 4 professional teams that play in Minnesota and their chances of winning a championship any time soon. After all, Minnesota is in a championship drought since 1991 when the Twins won the World Series. That's a long time for an area with 4 teams. Sometimes, it shocks me to think that the Twins have actually won the World Series twice. The only explanation that I can come up with is that the world passed into some kind of wonderful parallel universe in 1987 and 1991 to allow this to happen. But, at least it happened. It has been said that Cleveland, Seattle, Buffalo, San Diego and Oakland are the cities with the longest "championship droughts." Cleveland, in fact, has not won a championship since 1964. They are getting closer in the NBA, unless LeBron James leaves. Then, forget it. But what about the 4 Minnesota teams? Here are my less than scientific odds of the 4 teams winning a championship in their respective sport in the next 10 years:

NHL Minnesota Wild: Odds: 25-1. I will put them a little higher because they play in a sold-out building that allows them to spend to the maximum of the salary cap. They can afford free agents and they seem to have a competent GM in Cliff Fletcher. They don't have many draft picks, however, because Doug Risebrough traded all of them. And, they don't draft real well to begin with.

MLB Minnesota Twins: Odds: 3-1. New stadium. Higher payroll. Great drafting. All-star caliber players. The only problem is the New. York. Yankees.

NBA Minnesota Timberwolves: Odds: 25,000,000,000,000 to 1. Do I need to go into this?

NFL Minnesota Vikings: Odds: Cosmically impossible. No matter who plays for this team (See: Brett Favre), in what stadium, or at what time, they will never, ever win the Super Bowl in Minnesota. The sooner we all admit this, the healthier and happier we will all be. The only * is if they move to a different city. Then the odds change to 2 to 1 with 2 years.

So, I guess we have to keep rooting for the Twins. They could be our only chance.

What do you think? Do these teams have any shot at a championship?

Jeff